She sighs as she looks at the photo, trailing her finger over it. “I do. He was my best friend for so many years, after all.”
The friendship might’ve remained, but the lifestyle wasn’t one my mother was satisfied with, even when she might’ve convinced herself once that she was. But her heart had already moved on. I didn’t understand it at the time because I was so young, but I vividly remember the way she crumbled when she received the news that my father had passed. Even though she’d divorced him two years prior and had remarried, we both lost him that day.
“There’s my two girls,” Barry says from the doorway. He’s neatly dressed, obviously having just come from work.
He leans over and presses a kiss to my mother’s cheek in greeting and then shuffles his feet awkwardly. It’s not that I dislike Barry; we’ve just never had much in common. But he’s always provided everything I could ever want, and has tried his hardest to be a father to me. However, he never lived up to my father.
“I haven’t seen you for a while, Romi. Not after… Well, you know… your roommate. How are you doing, love?”
My mother’s head whips in his direction, giving him a stern expression, and I place the photos back in the envelope then into my handbag.
“I should get going; I just wanted to pick up a few things,” I tell them.
“Stay,” my mother pleads, and I offer her a small smile as I take the box into my closet and bury it back in the bottom drawer.
“I’d love to, Mom, but I’ve got plans tonight.” She doesn't need to know those plans include me back in the comfort of my pajamas in my bed, after I know a certain asshole has left for work. “Oh, Barry…” I add, facing him.
His gaze moves from my mother's reproachful glare to me. She was most likely scolding him for mentioning Lorraine, even though she’d intruded only days ago herself.
I don’t know how to best articulate my question. I mean, after all, I don’t even know what type of doctor Dante pretends to be, but it’s bothered me ever since I pulled out that satchel of scalpels.
“Do most doctors take their tools home with them?” I ask.
His eyebrows dip, and he looks to my mother. “I’ve definitely brought injectables home, if that’s what you’re asking.”
Way off the mark.
“Never mind.”
“Wait, Romi. Promise me you’ll come back for dinner sometime soon. Please?” my mother begs.
I sigh, that mounting guilt weighing on me.
Everyone wants me to pretend like everything’s gone back to normal.
But it hasn’t, and it won’t.
I squeeze her arm but make no promises.
I’m not yet ready for her help. Not ready to accept anyone's assistance in drawing me out of this personal hell I live in—mostly because I think I deserve it for failing Lorraine.
And I don’t want any of them seeing the real me right now, afraid they’ll uncover the ugliness within. This way I can protect them and myself, in a time when I’m grieving because I failed someone else I cared about deeply.
11
DANTE
“Fuck,” I grumble weakly after sneezing.
“The fuck, man. Are you sick?” Sky asks, looking at me like I’m spreading some kind of plague in his direction.
I knew going into that lake with Romi two nights ago was a bad idea. Totally fucking worth it, but like she usually does after we fuck, she’s avoided me.
I’ve finished collecting cash for Luca this evening, and all of the hounds except Kage have returned from their solo missions. Most likely, he ended up organizing body bags. Now I wish I’d been sent on that job instead.
We’re sitting in the fighting arena below Balmere. Tonight, bets will be placed and money exchanged.
I sneeze again.
