The grouse fat drips into the fire, hissing and popping, and we're both quiet as tension stretches between us. She's not wrong. Running isn't sustainable, but fighting back means putting other people at risk, and I've already destroyed enough lives.
"These men are ruthless," I finally say. "They shot a cop without hesitation. And they'll do the same thing to anyone who tries to help us."
"Maybe. Or maybe you don't realize what community can do when people bind together." She turns the spit, checking the bird's progress. "You've spent your whole life in a world where trust is weakness, where connections are liabilities. But that's not how normal people operate. We help each other. We stand together. And it makes us stronger."
I don't have any concept of community or family outside of my time with the Ferraros, and that was nothing but a prison with guards who paid you well. I'm not sure how to do what she's asking.
"The Ferraro family was my community," I say, pulling the grouse from the fire and tearing off a chunk. "And they sent me to kill a friend. That's what happens when you trust people. They use you, betray you, destroy you."
"That wasn't a community, Dane." Sloane takes a piece I offer her, blowing on it to cool the meat.
I eat without speaking because what she's suggesting is actually a little intimidating, almost scary to me. Trusting someone else is how I got where I am, and trusting folks who have shown outright contempt for me feels like the stupidest thing I could do right now.
"I don't know how to trust that," I admit. "How can I believe people would help us without wanting something in return?"
"Just start with trusting me." She meets my eyes across the fire. "I believe Ellie would help. I believe the people in Sutter's Gap aren't going to turn us over to Cal just because he shows up with threats. We have a better chance fighting back together than running alone."
I finish my portion and toss the bones into the fire. My stomach is still growling, demanding more, but this'll have to do until we can get real supplies. The food gives me energy, clarity, enough to start thinking tactically instead of reactively.
"Then let's clean this up and get on the move. We'll have a better chance at getting into town if we do it early. They'll be watching…"
Sloane's eyes track up to meet mine and she nods at me, accepting that the war we're heading into will be violent and terrifying but not backing down.
"Let me finish breakfast first. Girl needs her strength…" Her lighthearted words don't make it easier for me to move away from her.
What we're going to walk into might destroy us both. We could end up dead. And she's not backing down.
Sloane is an incredible woman and if we survive this, I'm a fool if I don't make her mine. But I'm a bigger fool if I keep her thinking I can protect her. Because Cal Maddox is only the beginning of my worries. Enemies will come out of the woodwork to track me down.
20
SLOANE
Dane and I argued for at least fifteen minutes over who would knock on Ellie's door, standing in the snow at the edge of town where we hid the snowmobile. Now I'm freezing, feet drenched through socks and sneakers, and Dane stands hidden with his gun in hand behind the old tool shed that squats next to Ellie's house.
He swears no one in this town is trustworthy, but I know people. And after getting to know Ellie Hooper, I know she'll help us, and she may even be able to convince other people to help us too. We didn’t shoot that sheriff, and anyone who's seen those men in their fancy SUVs knows they don't belong here. If anyone will have sympathy for us, it'll start with Ellie.
After knocking and waiting a few minutes, I see movement inside the house. Ellie's eyes flash through a part in the curtains and I see her house robe and messy hair. We've woken her up, which was probably inevitable given how late it is. But it isn't like we can parade around outside in broad daylight. The trek back to town took us forever and then we had to sit and shiver and wait for night to fall so it was safe.
"Sarah? What are you doing here?" she asks as she pulls the door open. Her green eyes scan me from head to toe, taking in my disheveled appearance. Her hands lash the belt of her robe tightly around her waist as she glances up and down the street. "Get inside. You're freezing."
"I need to talk to you." I step into the warmth of her entryway, and it takes everything in me not to collapse right there. Twenty-four hours in the frigid mountains have depleted every reserve I had. My toes are frost bitten. My belly is hungry, and I'm annoyed by how pessimistic Dane Strouse can be. "And I need your help."
"Of course. Anything." She closes the door and guides me toward the kitchen, and I feel a pang of guilt for leaving Dane standing out there in the cold as I start to thaw out. "I heard what happened at your brother's cabin. The whole town's talking about it. Is he with you? Is he okay?" She moves toward the stove, putting a kettle on and turning the burner on. I'm not much of a tea person, but I won’t pass up anything that could warm me.
"He's here… outside, waiting. I wanted to talk to you first, make sure…" I stop myself, choosing my words carefully. I don't want to scare her off at all. If I screw this up, maybe she'll just call the deputy and turn us in. "Make sure you'd be willing to help before I brought him in."
Her eyes narrow as her frown deepens, and she pulls out two mugs. "Why wouldn't I be willing to help? What's going on, Sarah?"
"That's not my name." After weeks of letting her believe the lie Dane told everyone, I feel guilty. My shoulders sag as I say, "I'm not Sarah and I'm not Dane's sister."
Ellie's quiet for a moment, studying me. Then she crosses her arms and leans against the counter. "I figured something wasn't right. Nobody looks at their brother the way you look at him. So, who are you really?" A brief smile flits across her face as she sighs and continues to study me.
"My name is Sloane Grady. I'm the woman on the news, the missing nurse from New York." I watch her face for fear or disgust or the impulse to call the police, but I see none of those things. Just concern. "I was drugged and kidnapped and brought to Sutter's Gap by people who want to hurt both of us. Dane—his real name is Dane—found me and kept me safe. But something bigger is going on, and the men who want me, well…" I look her right in the eye and see only compassion. "They are the ones who shot Mr. Carver. They found Dane's cabin."
"They're like criminals? Like, gang or Mafia?" Ellie looks at me like she can't believe what I'm saying. "That's what we're dealing with here? That's why those men in suits have been circling town?"
"Yes. They want Dane for something he did years ago. And they want me because they blame me for something I couldn't prevent." My hands are finally starting to warm up a little, but I'm still shivering. It feels good to tell someone the truth, but I realize as I'm doing it that there isn't much Ellie can do. She can offer us a place to stay, but it means they may come after her now too. I just can't fathom going back out on that mountain in the dark again. "I know this is asking a lot, but if you could just give us a safe place for tonight, somewhere to rest and figure out our next move?—"
