If I was with her that day, she would still be alive. I could have saved her if I just had been a little more observant. But I wasn’t, I didn’t save her, and I wasn’t there when she needed me.
That’s why I’m doing this. She needs to come back to me so I can show her that Iamcapable of saving her. I need her to be proud of me.
“Ector, I truly need to write something down.”
“Okay.” He says without arguing.
Letting my back rest against a rock, I pick up the feather pen and book from my bag.
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I don’t know if I’m starting to let go of Esme's passing or if I’m just distracted by this incredibly handsome guy, Ector. Maybe it’s both? Maybe it feels easier when I’m not alone and enjoying someone's presence for once.
Everything feels easier when I’m around him. I’m worried that I’m starting to fall in love with him. I don’t want to fall in love with him, at least not right now, but I’m not the one in charge of that decision after all. My emotions are in complete control of themselves, and I have no say in it.
I’m not scared of falling for him, I’m just scared that I’m the only one who’s falling. I know he kissed me and all, but you can kiss anyone. I’m afraid. Something good has finally come into my life after all the hurt. And I’m scared that once I let myself feel excited, something bad will happen.
My thoughts are shifting from Esme to Ector constantly and it truly
terrifies me. I can't let myself forget about my sister.
All love// Genevieve
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I shouldn’t worry so much about something that is out of my control. Maybe I should just let go of trying to figure it all out and trust that the path will reveal itself for me in the near future. It’s in these moments of wondering and uncertainty that we can find our true strength.
So, I take a deep breath, feeling the heavy weight lift off my shoulders, and with a new sense of calm, I walk forward to Ector and let him know that I am ready to continue. I am ready to face whatever comes my way.
Chapter 24
Ector
“Is everything okay?”
“Yes. Everything is absolutely perfect.” She says with excitement and dances forward. “Can I see the map?”
If I want her to trust me, I need to be able to trust her. So with that in mind, I let her hands take the map.
“Thank you for trusting me and letting me take a look for myself.” She places a kiss on my cheek to end her sentence.
The map is showing that our next stop will be Mermaid Lake, a place I have never been to but heard a lot about. It’s supposed to be one of the finest places to exist.
“It looks like we might have to sleep somewhere on the way there, I don’t think we’ll be able to go all the way before the dark hours arrives."
It makes me uncomfortable knowing that she won’t be as protected as I’d like her to be. It’s unsettling. Anything can happen out here and for that reason, I need to keep myself awake.
“Oh, okay.” Nervousness seeps through her voice.
We walk in the bright green forest for hours, and as the sun begins to set, I realize that it’s about time that we build a fire and find somewhere to sleep.
As the sky turns pitch black, we arrive at a place that looks like someone’s abandoned old home. Trees that must’ve been planted have grown into a circle, and big, dry leaves have been braided around the broad trunks.
Looking around, our eyes trying to adjust to the darkness, it feels better to stay here than to continue searching for another place that might not come.
“Should we stay here?” Her angelic voice asks, almost as if she was reading my thoughts.
“I think that would be for the best.”
