“That doesn’t make any sense.”
“Did you do it?”
“Yes.”
“Now, do you feel better?”
“Maybe.”
“Good. That means I’ve effectively distracted you.”
He gave her fingers a tug. “You’ve been effectively distracting me since morning.”
She blushed at that and tucked her chin into the collar of her cloak. The ground was cold, and it seeped into her bones, but it was good, because that meant it would keep the heat at bay. They weren’t going to stay here long. She figured that a few minutes a day lying under the open sky would help Rune build up resistance. She didn’t want to traumatize him.
“Have you ever...” He started, then shook his head, changing his mind.
“What? Have I ever what?”
He let out a pained sigh as if he regretted asking the question.
“Have you ever done that before?”
“What we did earlier? Sometimes I do it when I’m alone. But I’ve never done it with a man.”
“I see...”
She bit the inside of her lip. “But I’m not... I mean, I wasn’t...” How could she say this? She wanted to be honest with him without going into details that would slash her wounds open. “I’m not a virgin, is what I’m trying to say.”
“I know.”
“You... do?”
“I heard what you said to Hartmann. I’m sorry, I know I shouldn’t have. I was within earshot, and I...”
She shook her head. “No, it’s fine. I understand.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Hm.” She smiled. “You say sorry like you mean it, but you never did anything to be sorry about. Do you say it preemptively?”
“Sometimes I think I say it for all the people who should’ve said it to you and didn’t.”
Seraphina didn’t know what to say to that. There were times when she could easily compare him to a child, from how lost he was in the way of the world. And the ways of a woman. But then, there were times like this, when he was more aware than she gave him credit for, and these were the times when he left her speechless.
“Do you want to talk about it?” he prodded gently.
“No. That is the day I died. I know it sounds stupid. I’m here, living, breathing, wanting... I’m alive, but that still remains the day I died.”
“It doesn’t sound stupid. I wish it didn’t happen to you. You’re pure in my eyes, Seraphina.”
She laughed. “So, you think if I sacrificed myself to save someone, and my bones were buried in the ground, they would become relics?”
He frowned at that. “Don’t talk about sacrificing yourself.”
“Of course not. I’m not the type. Purists are into that, sometimes even doctrinists. I’m a pragmatist through and through. I’d rather use relics than become them.”
Rune released her hand and reached out to run his fingers through her blond hair. Seraphina hummed at his careful touch.
