It’s one of the few times Mimi looks ashamed. “Sorry,” she says, quietly and quickly enough that she can deny ever apologising. “But…he hates us.”
“Jude?” I ask.
Mimi nods. “Remember that dinner we had? It was a disaster. He totally hates us. Even this morning and at recess. He just stood there without saying anything. I can just tell he thinks I’m dumb as fuck.”
Sure, Jude was quiet this morning and at recess, and maybe before, I would have interpreted his expressions as judgemental, but now I know him well enough to know he’s simply shy. Heacts aloof to protect himself, and he’s not super familiar with my friends.
“He doesn’t hate you,” I tell Mimi. “He’s just reserved and takes a while to open up to people. You don’t have to be best friends with him and he doesn’t have to be best friends with you, but I care about him a lot, so it would be nice if you could all get along. I’m saying that he’s a good guy, no matter how he seems from the outside.”
Mimi nods slowly, the set of her shoulders looking…defensive, which is surprising since I’ve always thought she was drowning in self-assurance. But maybe that assumption was totally wrong — maybe she’s insecure about the idea that Jude might not like her, and that’s why she’s saying all this to me.
Or maybe not. I can’t know. If the anonymous hookup thing with Jude has taught me anything, I can’t make assumptions about other peoples’ lives, thoughts, or personalities.
“The dinner wasn’t a total disaster,” Lily says softly. “We had a good talk about cakes and birthdays, right?”
I nod. I suppose, though, my memories of that night are overshadowed by other parts: Jude leaving hastily, the way he said absolutely not…the way he wiped the corner of my mouth with a napkin, the way I ate the rest of his pizza slice and Ricky pointed out the indirect kiss.
“Maybe if we had dinner all together again, things would go better,” Lily suggests. “And this time, everyone will be on their best behaviour.”
Before Jude climbs into the passenger seat, he takes off his blazer and neatly folds it. After he closes the door behind him, we watch as the cars parked on either side of us reverse out.
Jude checks his phone. “I’m meeting my mum at five-ish,” he reminds me.
“We won’t be long.” I’ve already taken my blazer off and shoved it into my schoolbag without bothering to fold it. Even though it’s chilly outside, my skin was warm with anticipation as I walked here.
“Alright,” Jude says, then leans over the centre console, wraps my school tie around his hand and tugs me close. We kiss hard, then slow and soft, then hard again. When was the last time I kissed Jude? It feels like forever ago.
Will kissing him ever get old? Sure, this part is novel — seeing him pant when we pull back to catch our breaths, his pillowy bottom lip swollen and pink, but I’ve been kissing him since Ethan’s party all those months ago, and I’m still starving for more.
“How was your day?” I ask, pulling away. “Got a lot of learning done?”
“Mm,” Jude says. He presses a chaste kiss to the underside of my jaw.
“What about lunch? Did you ask all your Physics questions?”
“Yep.” Another kiss underneath my ear.
“I talked to my friends at lunch. They want to have dinner with you.”
That makes Jude pull back. He doesn’t look alarmed or displeased, more…confused. “Really? Why?”
“I don’t know, maybe because you’re my boyfriend or something.”
Jude rolls his eyes. “You never officially asked, by the way.”
He’s right. We didn’t talk about the details. I just invited him to a sleepover at my house, and then we had sex and kissed and slept in each other’s arms. “Jude Fitzwilliam Seymour, will you be my boyfriend?”
“You remember my middle name?”
“You gave me such a hard time about that book Pride and Prejudice, of course I remember.”
Jude winces. “I’m such a dick.”
“It’s okay. Besides, the fact that your middle name starts with F is burned into my brain.”
“That reminds me, what’s your middle name?”
“Sorry, that’s classified information.”
