Forthe bacon dish? A thickly cut piece to feel like steak, crispy on the outside,perfectly done on the inside, served with a tomatillo and jicama chutney and amicrogreen salad on top.
Thethoughts spiraled through me, anchoring my feet to the ground when all my bodywanted to do was float away.
Icould do this. I could impress Ezra.
Maybe.
Hopefully.
Okay,at the very least I could manage to get through casually meeting him tonightwithout un-impressing him. That was my goal—don’t un-impress him.
Icleared my throat, hiding the wobble waiting in the wings. “Oh yeah? When doyou think that will be?”
Shelifted one shoulder in a helpless shrug. “I have no idea. Who knows why or whenthe man does the things that he does.”
Ihad been in the kitchen all night, working alongside Vera and getting a feelfor the Sarita kitchen. Service was so different here. I hadn’t expected tofeel quite so out of my depth.
Mostof the reservations at Lilou were for two-tops, seating two people, and theoccasional four-top. Because the reservation list was so many months out, mostpeople only risked including one other person—usually a person they werelegally bound to by marriage. Or on a date seriously trying to impress theother party. But at Sarita everything was a massive party. And I didn’t meanthe vibe of this place. Every table had four plus diners. And they orderedcopious amounts of dishes thanks to the way they were served stacked on top ofeach other.
InLilou’s kitchen, our normal table needed two plates finished at the same time.Here we were talking an average of six to eight plates ready all at once. Andtwice tonight, we’d had three orders of fifteen plus plates.
Ihad stopped thinking terrible thoughts about Juan Carlo three hours ago. I’ddecided that he was a saint to put up with this for as long as he did. I alsounderstood why this kitchen was messier than I was used to. At the speed peoplemoved around this kitchen, it was no wonder it had been total chaos. Thesepeople didn’t just cook, they flew.
Verapaused over the dish she was finishing in tandem with mine and smiled at me.“Don’t be nervous,” she encouraged. “You’re fabulous.”
Iwas sweaty. And maybe smelly. Like, I said, tonight had been a doozy. But toVera, I said, “Thanks. And thanks for doing this with me. Even if I don’t getthe job, this has been a great experience.”
Hersmile widened with genuine kindness. “First of all, if you don’t get this job,Ezra is bananas. Because you’re amazing. And second, there are plenty of otherpositions around the city that you would be great for. This isn’t your onlyshot.” She leaned in. “For instance, I know of a great little up and comingrestaurant that could use good staff.”
Ilaughed. “Is it that new place called Pepper?”
Shefrowned immediately. “Don’t joke. That’s literally my biggest fear. Killianwants to name the baby Pepper. He’s all, get it? And I’m like, OMG, stop.”
“Thebaby?”
Hereyes widened until they were the size of the moon. “Oh my God. I didn’t mean tosay that!” Her head whipped right and left checking out who had overheard.Satisfied that her words had been lost in the clatter of dinner service, sheleaned in and begged, “Please don’t say anything to anyone, Kaya! We’re keepingit a secret for a while longer. We haven’t even told our families and they willbe pissed if they’re the last ones to find out.”
“I’mso happy for you,” I told her, my smile so big it hurt my cheeks. “I won’t sayanything. But I am so, so happy for you!”
Hercheeks turned pink, but the panicked look on her face softened. “Thank you.It’s super early. I mean, I haven’t even been to the doctor yet. I’ve only peedon a stick. And puked my guts out for the last two weeks. All signs point tobaby.” She smiled down at her nonexistent tummy. “But I’ll feel better after myfirst checkup.”
“Gah!”I squealed again. “This is so exciting!”
Shelaughed. “And also, maybe the worst timing ever with Salt opening in two monthsand the wedding coming up. But at least I won’t be showing too badly for ourwedding. I would die if I had to take my dress back. It’s too pretty to partwith.”
Myshoulders sagged, and an ache spread over my chest. “Listen to you, Vera. Hasyour life ever been this perfect? You literally have everything going for youright now.”
Sheshook her head. “I don’t know about that.”
Iheld up a hand and ticked off reasons why she was my superhero. “You’re engagedto one of the hottest chefs in the country. And he’s good-looking.” I winked ather to be cute. “You’re also having his baby. And getting married. Oh, andyou’re opening your dream restaurant. I mean, seriously, you are the definitionof happily ever after.”
“Hey,happily ever after is a lot of work.” She frowned again. “It’s also beencovered in puke lately.”
Ilaughed with her, but I couldn’t help but feel jealous. And something worse.Something like despair. Standing next to Vera, I felt wholly unqualified to workin this kitchen or in this industry or even as a basic human. She was a truesuperstar. She had this amazing fiancé and an incredible business that wasbound to take off with the two of them involved.
Andshe was going to have Killian Quinn’s child. I mean, could you imagine thepalate on that baby? It was bound to come out of the womb wielding a sauté pan.
Shenudged me with her shoulder as she finished the final touches to the plate infront of me and handed it off to the server. “Seriously, Kaya, you’re sweet,but there is nothing to be jealous of. You’ll get your version of happily everafter too. It won’t look exactly like mine, but it shouldn’t. You deserve your specialthing and for it to be tailored to you.” She smiled gently. “And you’ll find ittoo. Whoever it’s with… whichever restaurant you work in… whatever you end updoing… it will work out. It’s probably going to be completely different thananything you thought you were going to do or be or marry. Life has a way oftaking all of our expectations, flipping them on their heads, and then laughingat us while we flounder around in search of which piece goes where.”
