Vera answered onthe third ring. “What up, Molls? Are you at work?”
She was in akitchen somewhere if the sound of clanking dishes, pots and pans was anyindication. Immediately, I felt better, more relaxed. When everything feltcrazy, jumbled and out of my control, she was the pillar that kept me anchoredto sanity.
“Yes. Remind me whythough?” I begged her, hoping to keep the real emotion out of my voice. “Ivaguely remember winning the lottery. Tell me it was real.”
“First, stop buyingscratch tickets. They never solve your problems. Second, you love healthinsurance. That’s why you’re at work.” Her voice gentled. “Have you had a badday?”
“Super bad,” Iadmitted. “Unless those scratch tickets end up paying off.”
“They won’t,” shelaughed. “Sorry to burst your bubble.”
I groaned. “Prettysure my bubble was already popped.”
“Well, hey, I havenews that might perk you up.”
“Give it to me,” Isighed. “Give me the will to work again.”
Vera’s laughindicated that she was super excited to share her information with me. Mycuriosity was instantly piqued.
I heard a door openand close as she moved to a quieter space. Her voice dropped low and she said,“I overheard Killian on the phone with Ezra. Apparently, he wants to take youon a legit date. He wanted Killian’s advice on how not to screw this up with you.”
“Oh, no,” Iwhispered.“Oh, no!”
Of course Vera kneweverything about Ezra and me. Because I’d told her everything. There wasnothing else to do after my worst-case scenario reaction on Saturday thaninvite my BFF over, ply her with wine and ice cream, and confess all of thekissing, flirting, and running away like a giant chicken I did. Afterward,she’d graciously analyzed every single nuance with me until she was convincedwe were going to have a double wedding—our childhood dream—and I confirmed shewas insane.
She had reacted exactlylike I’d expected her to—with massive congratulations and a wedding lecturelike I had never heard before.
She had so manyopinions on flowers and dresses and groom’s cakes. But after that, I had sharedall of my fears and concerns. She had sympathized like I knew she would andtogether we’d decided that I should calm down and take this one day at a time.
I didn’t have tohave all of the answers with Ezra right this second. I didn’t have to know howevery single thing would play out or what would happen to us or if we would getpast the first date. I just needed to make the best of today.
It was wise advicethat I immediately took to heart.
I had beenfailingmiserablydoing that until just now.
“Molly, you can’thide from him forever.” Her voice dropped to a whisper indicating that herfiancé was in listening distance. “From what I heard Killian say to him, I’mnot even sure Ezra realizes you’re hiding from him. I think he’s just been sofocused on work that he might think this is normal. No offense! Things atBianca are tense.”
“Son of a bitch,” Igrowled. It wasn’t that I wanted to make this great big I’m-avoiding-youstatement. It just complicated my feelings for him. I’d wrongly assumed he wasavoiding me on purpose, because of some flaw or miscommunication. But if he’dbeen swamped with work and I’d turned this into something that it was not, thenthe stupid softening of my heart and anticipatory sighing of my girly bitscould be a problem.
I had alreadydecided that we couldn’t date. I didn’t even want to date him. Okay, fine, thatwas a dirty, filthy lie. But I only wanted to date him in theory. I couldn’tactually date him. Not if I enjoyed an intact heart and not having to hearabout a fabulous new EFB Enterprises restaurant named Molly.
Vera made animpatient sound in the back of her throat. “Are you really that worried aboutgoing on one date with the man? I mean, Molly, he’s freaking gorgeous. And he’sa really good guy. He’s dependable and loyal and secretly nice. At least get afree meal and solid make out from him. You’re too uptight these days. You needa good lay.”
“Oh, my god. VeraMayDelane! Don’t be gross!”
She laughed on herend of the phone. “Come on, be honest. When’s the last time you got some good,mind-blowing action.”
Wrinkling my nose,I confessed, “Um, college? No, it was before then.Er,that guy I dated from senior chemistry? What was his name… Josh?”
“Jed?” Vera guessedtoo. “Jake!”
“Jake Begley. Goodlord, he was hot.”
“And dumb. Rememberhow he thought the periodic table was an actual table. He kept looking for itin thechemlab all year.”
I snorted. “That’snot true.”
“Mmm, pretty sure it’s true.”
