Insecurity was quickly replaced withoutrage. Did this guy not know anything about the food industry?
I tapped out a response to James Q. Andcould we be honest for a second? That didn’t even sound like a real name.
Foodiethe Food Truck: Thanks for the unwanted advice, James Q. But you missed thepoint, idiot. Go back to trolling the internet and living in your mom’sbasement.
I quickly backspaced before my itchyfingers accidentally pressed send against my better judgment. The customer, orpotentialcustomer, in this case, wasalways right.
Foodiethe Food Truck: Thanks for your concern, James.
We were obviously on a first namebasis by now. He’d lost his right to the Q and any formality by being acomplete jackass.
I continued my message response.
Foodiethe Food Truck:But, I am not interested in competing withthe other restaurants. In fact, I wouldn’t even consider myself a restaurant.I’m offering a completely different service that I’m hoping will be very popularin that particular section of town. Thank you for reaching out to me. I hopeyou give Foodie a try sometime soon!
I pressed send, impressed with myprofessionalism.
The cursor started blinkingimmediately, telling me he had started his reply.
Well,James. That was fast.Maybe he really was hanging out in his mom’s dingy basement.
A sense of dread filled me. If thisguy was a troll, I might have just set him off. Both Vann and Molly warned menot to engage with people just looking for attention.
Justignore the bad reviews,Vann advised.Interacting with them makesyou the douche.
I scanned my message again, assuringmyself that I didn’t add any douche-ness to it. I hoped I was good. James Qalready seemed to have made up his opinion of me from his first message, sothis could be bad.
JamesQ: The other restaurants might beg to differ.
I huffed at the screen, not likingJames Q’s reply at all. So what if they thought I was competition? I didn’tmove to the plaza to make friends. At least, not with the other restaurants.
I was across the street fromLiloufor God’s sake. Nobody would ever put my food next toKillian Quinn’s and call it equal. Any sane person would feel sorry for me.
I felt sorry for me.
I tried appealing to James’s softerside. That’s right, I was going to win him over with my upbeat attitude andindomitable spirit.Kumbaya, James Q. Namaste and all that.
Foodiethe Food Truck:The goal of Foodie is to make good, latenight food that people can enjoy after a fun night out!
I worried over my exclamation point.Was it too much? Was James going to assume I was a hyperactive chipmunk?
JamesQ: So, you’re catering to hammered club rats by serving greasy street tacos?
Oh, my God, James Q was a realasshole! Forget that his estimation was almost exactly what I was trying to do.It was rude coming from a total stranger on the internet.
And what’s wrong with greasy streettacos?
Nothing.
Not a damn thing.
Hoping to wrap this up, I replied aspolitely as possible.
Foodiethe Food Truck:Thanks again for getting in touch with me.I hope you change your mind about Foodie and give us a try!
Areyou kidding me? Did I just use another exclamation point? What was wrong withme? This guy didn’t deserve exclamation points!
Oops.I meant, this guy didn’t deserve exclamation points. Please note the angryperiod at the end of that sentence.
