“She would have liked you,” Matt went on. “She would have understood, which is why Nate is trying to understand.”
“Why do you say that?” Alarm bells started ringing in my head.
They were justified when Matt explained, “She came from a really bad home life. She was never very open with the details, at least with me, but I know it was pretty bad for her. When she met Nate, she had already escaped a world of pain. She would have wanted you to get out of your situation, Ivy. She would have supported you in every single way.”
“Ryder must be a lot like her.”
Matt grinned at me. “In all the best ways.”
“Thank you for telling me that. And thank you for supporting Ryder. I know it means a lot to him.”
He chuckled, “Yeah, well, Ryder is going to do whatever he wants anyway. This way when things finally settle down, he feels like he can come back home.”
I had heard Ryder say that before, but it finally hit me how true those words were. Would there be a time in our future when Ryder would be able to go back home? Would we ever be safe enough to see his family again?
I hoped so.
“Take care of him, Ivy,” Matt gave his one final order. “Be good to him.”
I nodded, but suddenly the future felt too heavy for me to hold. Take care of Ryder? How? How could I protect him from the things I couldn’t even protect myself from? How could I keep him safe when I couldn’t even keep myself safe?
“I’ll try,” I whispered.
Matt had already moved on though. He didn’t hear my weak promise or the catch in my confidence. He walked over to Ryder and pulled him into a long goodbye hug. I watched the two men embrace in awe.
I had never had family like that. I had never cared about anybody but Honor and myself until I met Ryder.
And yet Ryder was willing to give up his easy home life to follow me to the pits of the Underworld.
It just didn’t make sense.
Nate walked over to me and I could see the purpose etched into his wrinkled forehead. He held my frightened gaze with one that was strikingly similar to his son’s.
Nate Sutton was the exact picture of a cool college professor. He taught music in the performing arts department at our local university and I could imagine all of the kids loving his class because he was the one professor that “got” them.
He somehow managed to meld his age with his hip style and this old world wisdom I found absolutely charming. Ryder looked up to his dad and his uncle with unwavering respect and to me that spoke volumes.
“He’s leaving for a reason,” Nate greeted in that upfront way I knew Ryder got from him.
“I told him not to come with me.” I fidgeted nervously in front of him.
Nate graced me with a wide smile. “You even tried to leave him here before, yeah?”
I glanced at Ryder and hoped he didn’t overhear this. “Yeah. I tried.”
“Then as his dad, that’s all I can ask. He wants to go with you, Ivy. I’m not going to stop him and you shouldn’t either. He needs to make his own choice or this is always going to be a regret for him.”
“It’s just… it’s not safe,” I argued. “I want to keep him safe.”
Nate’s eyes softened with compassion. “Ivy, that’s what he wants to do for you. I suggest you let him.”
“What if… what if something happens? It’s dangerous, Nate. He could get hurt or worse. I’m worried that…” I trailed off. I couldn’t tell Nate everything I was worried about. There were too many things that could happen and probably would happen. Nate seemed pretty chill about Ryder leaving; I didn’t want to turn this into a bad situation.
Nate laughed lightly and held my gaze. “Ivy, Ryder is not looking for something safe. He could have had safe whenever he wanted it over the last year. Instead, he waited and waited and did as much as he could to prepare for the time when you came back. Matt and I tried to talk him out of you more than once over the long last year. We saw how hard it was for him to focus on the present and how difficult it was for him to lose you. We watched him fail over and over while his mind stayed preoccupied with you. That wasn’t easy for us, Ivy, but I can only imagine how hard it was for him. Still, he focused on you and what it would be like when you came back. He never once doubted that he would see you again. He never once gave up hope or changed his plans. He doesn’t want safe. I can say that without hesitation. He wants you. And on that note, love is hardly ever safe. It’s always a risk. No matter what the circumstances may be, we always risk something great when we decide to fall. Ryder trusts you to be enough for the risk to be worth it. He trusts that your heart will catch his and that you’ll give him the opportunity to have your forever.”
I was speechless. I didn’t think we were talking about love or forever.
That wasn’t what this was about.
