I will go to dinner with you when you are here in late August because it seems you are rather prepared to continue to ask until the end of your days, or mine. However, the restaurant you suggested, Capitol House, is a stuck-up establishment riding on the coattails of a bygone reputation for good steaks frequented by tourists reading outdated guidebooks and high school students before prom. I’ll meet you at Harry Browne’s on August 31 at 6:00 pm sharp. I won’t stay past 8:00 because I don’t drive in the dark.
Regards,
Sybil Van Antwerp
The College of English
University of Maryland, College Park
College Park, MD 20742
TO: Melissa Genet, Dean of the College of English
FROM: Sybil Van Antwerp, woman seeking permission to audit course at UMDCP
July 21, 2014
Dear Melissa,
I am writing again to request you reconsider your position on my auditing courses in the UMDCP College of English, something I have done onnineprevious occasions with the enthusiastic support of your predecessors. Might I add that since the genesis of my participation in the life of your university in this way I have given generous donations to the College of English every calendar year, as well as paid the auditing fee without gripe despite the fact that my presence in the classroom is of zero consequence? I do not participate (unless called upon). The professors do not grade my work. I might as well be a janitor, or a mouse!
According to the office of the registrar, per the information my son dug up for me on the webpage, UMDCP does, in fact, maintain the allowance of citizens not enrolled in the university to audit courseswith the permission of the dean of the particular college. It appears the matter is not one of policy, but of your caprice. Despite this chilly correspondence I would again like to request permission to audit a literature course.
I imagine you to be a reasonable woman. I look forward to your reply.
Ms. Van Antwerp
17 Farney Rd.
Arnold, MD
21012
August 1, 2014
Dear Ms. Van Antwerp,
I’m sorry I didn’t write to you on July 1. We were on vacation in Alaska with my sisters and I didn’t realize what day it was. When I saw that I missed July I thought it would be better to wait until the next first of the month rather than change the pattern of our letters. How is your eyesight doing? Have you told your brother or your kids you’re going blind? How will you live alone when you’re blind? Will you learn to read braille? I started to learn, in case you need me to. It’s very simple and I think I’ve mostly got it down. My mother listens to books on CD. You can get them at the library, and there is also a trading program at Cracker Barrel, the roadside restaurant. You can also buy them, but they areextremelyexpensive.
Here is what happened in June and July:
We went on a cruise to Alaska with my sisters. Lauren has a boyfriend and he came. His name is Steve and I don’t like him at all because he only talks about professional football and his job in marketing. My dad pretends to care, but I know he doesn’t because Dad doesn’t watch sports. I liked seeing all the animals (Isaw a bear eating salmon in the wild) and being outside. I liked how cool it was in summer, and the landscape was simple, which made me feel really peaceful. I didn’t like sleeping in the boat, and there were three nights when I had freakouts and didn’t sleep at all.
I wrote a story about a made-up world. It is 46 pages single-spaced size 12 Times New Roman font with one inch margins.
My mom spent a week in a hospital for people with mental problems and I didn’t see her during that time. I have no idea why she went to the hospital. My dad said she is very tired, but she doesn’t look tired. He looks tired, actually. I know nobody goes to a mental hospital because they’re tired, so I’m trying to figure out what’s wrong with her, but Lauren called me and told me it is hard for my dad when I ask loads of questions, so I haven’t. This happened in the beginning of June, before Alaska.
