“I did nae mean to!” she insisted. “Ye were leanin’ so close tae me, and…”
“Och, and now ye attempt tae claim thatImade ye spill wine all over my family heirloom?” he thundered.
“Not at all!” Her heart sank, and she took a step toward him. “Please, if there’s anything I can do tae make it better…”
“Aye, ye can stay away from this bloody room and everythin’ in it! I’ll not have ye destroyin’ more of my property! What a fool I was, thinkin’ that I could allow some outsider into my life without expectin’ her to immediately turn everythin’ upside-down and inside-out!”
Her mouth set into a thin and quivering line, and her eyes were full of fear and hurt. “There’s no need for that kind of talk,” she retorted quietly. “‘Twas an unfortunate accident, but an accident all the same.”
“Well, perhaps ye ought to go back to yer chambers and stay there in order to prevent any other ‘unfortunate accidents’ from occurrin’!” he shot back.
She did not know what else to say in the face of such rage. It seemed that no matter what words she tried to speak, they only stoked his ire all the more.
All that was left for her, then, was to do as he bade her and leave.
So she did, doing all that she could to keep herself from weeping on her way up to her room.
Isla remained there for the rest of the day and all night as well. Lily knocked a few times with offers of food, but Isla turned her away each time, noting that it was not Moira, and taking that as a message from the laird that he had decided to deliberately neglect her earlier request after all.
That only made her despair all the more, and she stayed in her bed and wept, wondering what she could do to improve her situation.
It had been folly, she realized, to so easily allow herself to believe that all would be well with a man such as this after only a single day of enjoying his company. She’d been a fool to get her hopes up, to let herself think that just because they shared a love of books and he had a tender side to him, they were destined to be happily married.
He remained the perfectionist tyrant that everyone had told her he was, and the notion of spending the rest of her life with such a temperamental and hostile man made her heartsick.
She could not go back to her parents, she knew. They would call this a failure on her part. They would accuse herof sabotaging the whole thing deliberately as an act of defiance against them.
The thing that made her more miserable than anything else, though, was this:
What if things hadn’t gone badly between them?
What if he had continued to be charming and pleasant to her, and they’d actually fallen in love? What if the wedding had continued as planned, and he’d carried her across the threshold on their wedding night?
Her secret was still her secret. But it wouldn’t remain so for long after that.
He would discover it the moment their lovemaking was done, and he would be furious with her. Perhaps he might even seek to have the union annulled… for had he not been promised an unspoiled bride?
Isla’s imagination took this possibility to its most terrible conclusion.
If she allowed the marriage to go forward while knowingly withholding the loss of her maidenhead from the groom…
She remembered the analogy Alex had presented during their ride together. Peace between clans was often maintained through such marriages. Given the fact that the MacDonells and Oliphants already had a violent history, Alex could easily decide that this was excuse enough to go to war with his old enemies.
And it would all have been her fault.
These hideous ideas continued to swirl around inside her head like dead leaves whipped up by a storm.
So Isla spent the next day sprawled on top of her bed, and continued to send Lily away whenever the servant girl tried to look in on her. She was certain that Lily would write to Elspeth and tattle on Isla for her unwillingness to leave her room and actively charm her groom-to-be, but she refused to let herself care about that.
It seemed to Isla that she was helplessly trapped, like a fly in a spider’s web. No matter what she did, nothing would allow her to escape this terrible situation, and the more she struggled, the tighter and more awful things seemed for her.
Lily visited a final time that evening, to tell Isla that Laird Alex requested her presence at dinner.
Isla merely remained silent until Lily gave up and withdrew.
Isla did not manage much sleep that night, but early the following morning, there was a knock at her door again. She was about to call out to dismiss Lily once more, until she heard the familiar voice from a few days ago: “My lady? ‘Tis Moira, here tae help ye dress for the day!”
This surprised Isla, and she went to the door, opening it a crack. Sure enough, the sweet plump servant girl was out in the hall.
