“Nilay…” she stepped back and he kept advancing.
“You don’t want a happy life?”
She was speechless.
“You don’t want my hand on your eyes when you sleep?”
Her face twisted.
“You don’t want walks on the beach and sandwiches?”
She was shaking her head.
“You don’t want sunflowers?”
She had gone as far as she could, the airport’s glass wall barring any further retreat.
“Sir, please move your car!” The security behind him parroted.
“She is leaving me and you want me to move my car?!” Nilay yelled, not taking his eyes off her. “I am a heart patient!”
“Nilay, go back home,” she managed, just as he closed in on her.
“What are these different goals?”
She shook her head, her eyes looking like they were ready to tear up. He pushed on — “Because if it is about our living arrangements, then I am ready to move. I will come with you to New York, right now. Like not today, though I will if it’s that important. But give me one week. I haven’t gone to the office in 10 days. Let me wrap things up for the month and I will come. Please, Ritu, just stay for a week. And then we can talk about where to settle… you want to settle with me, isn’t it? What is it? Am I still too much of obnoxious? Do I still offend you? Do I make you feel uncomfortable? Do you not love me too…?” His voice broke. “Have I been reading this wrong the whole time?”
Tears were falling down her eyes and he palmed the back of her head, pulling her face into his shoulder. “Please tell me,” he caressed her hair.
“Life is not Mills & Boons…”
“What the fuck have I been trying to show you all these days?!”
“You want children.” Her choked voice sounded in his shoulder. So low, only he could hear. He turned his mouth to her ear — “You wanted them too. You said having a baby like MM is your big dream.”
“It’s a dream…”
“Ok, Doctor, explain the difference to me. You don’t want a dream?”
“I can’t have it.”
“What? Children?”
“I am 39, about to turn 40, with PCOD and a world of hormonal problems,” she whispered in his shoulder. “You don’t have great odds with me for that future. In fact, slim to none. Nilay, it’s better we end this right now while it’s new…”
“Shut up. I am 41. What difference does that make?”
She pulled away, her eyes enraged but her voice still low. “You can impregnate a woman even when you are 70!”
“That will be a little impossible, considering I want to impregnate only you, and even you will be 70.”
She scowled — “So obnoxious.”
“It’s the truth. So what? We will find other ways to have kids. We will…” he glanced around, finding Maya standing at a distance with MM in her arms, looking away but holding an ear out sneakily. “Ask Maya and Gautam to have one more for us.”
“You can’t outsource everything!” Ritu laughed through the sob. He smiled — “We will adopt, or surrogacy or… Ritu, we will find a way. And even if we can’t, it will be you and me.”
“And then you will become bitter because I couldn’t give you children.”
