Neither did I. “I hoped to find a way of changing things without bloodshed.”
“There will be no choice but war now,” Bina said. “The primordial evil won’t negotiate. It will take what it wants by force.”
“What do you know about it?” Dharma asked.
“I’ve heard stories,” she said. “They say it came from the stars. A hunger. A disease. One that wanted nothing but to devour. The deva fought it. Caged it. Even then it found a foothold.”
“The devouring force,” Joe said.
“Yes.” Bina looked out the window. “There will be war. But we’ll be by your side when you bring the evil down.” She looked at me. “By earth and rock, I vow it.”
My stomach clenched. I’d have to stab Araz through the heart.
No.
Not Araz.
Thethingwearing Araz’s body.
It wasn’t until Dharma reached across to touch my knee, her face etched in lines of concern, that I realized how fast and shallow I was breathing.
“It will be okay,” she said. “You won’t be alone. We promise.”
“I know.” I covered her hand with mine. “Thank you.”
“If we’re gonna be with you, then we’re going to have to take some flying lessons,” Joe said.
The Authority had removed the need for the air trial and expedited the labyrinth to try to get rid of me, which meant my friends would need some training on a thunderbird’s back.
“I’ll speak to Chandra. You guys will get whatever you need. But now that you know the truth, now that you understandwhat’s possible, it will be tempting to share this with your drohi. To treat them differently and break away from the current dynamic. You know the wholethey serve youvibe. But you can’t. You can’t tell them, and you can’t change your behavior too much or they’ll suspect something.”
“What?” Dharma frowned. “You want us to keep this from our drohi? To lie? Why?”
“I know it feels icky but think about it. They’ve been raised to serve. Raised to believe that they weregivento the Asura. That their families were complicit, and maybe for some of them thatistrue, but we don’t know…We don’t know how they might react to finding out the truth. To discovering that they may have been stolen from their families, ripped away from their mothers. And we have no idea what kind of failsafes the Asura put into place in case of a drohi rebelling, even subconsciously. Araz was different. Maybe because he came later, or maybe because he was an Agni djinn, I don’t know. But we need to move carefully. The last thing we want is to trigger something that might hurt them or have them taken from us. Once you ascend, you can set them free.”
Dharma nodded. “I don’t like it, but okay. It makes sense not to rock the boat this close to ascension.”
“I’ll do whatever it takes to keep Mahira safe,” Joe said.
“I agree,” Bina added. “We must move forward with caution. If the Asura realize that we know the truth, then they may stop our ascension altogether.”
“Good point,” Dharma said.
The carriage dipped. Bina gripped the sill again, letting out a shaky laugh.
“Gods, it’s amazing,” Joe said, his gaze on the view outside the carriage window.
Dharma pulled the blanket up to her shoulders, snuggling down. “It’s also fucking freezing. Chaya usually warms me up.” She grinned cheekily, but her smile died when she met my gaze.
My heart sank. “Don’t do that. Don’t dim your joy because of me. We’ve both had loss.”
She pressed her lips together. “It’s strange. The loss of Priti…it’s so fresh, but sometimes I forget. I forget and I laugh. Or I get this burst of joy, and then I remember, and this wave of desolation washes over me, but it’s accompanied by guilt.”
“Grief is a fucked-up thing,” Joe said.
“It is indeed,” Bina agreed. “You never forget; you just learn to live with the loss.”
“Who did you lose?” Joe asked her bluntly.
