“If I am to be vexed, I should rather keep walking.”
He looked uncertain, but since there were no seats in the vicinity, he had little choice but to acquiesce, and they walked on. She was glad of the activity when he explained that Jane had been exposed as the source of every damning piece of gossip they had heard flying about London and regurgitated on Lady Catherine’s lips.
“I had not thought Jane so bad as this! I had supposed her to be jealous of my station, but I did not suspect her of descending to such malicious revenge!”
“Upon my word, I cannot forgive her for wounding you thus, first with violence, now with calumny, for which you have suffered doubly, what with society’s disdain and Darcy’s.”
She slowed her pace, bemused as to his meaning until she recalled the last time they were in company. “If you are referring to our evening at the theatre, you must not concern yourself a moment longer. There was much talk, but Darcy’s overhearings at least were easily gainsaid. The matter is quite settled between us.”
“I am in awe of your forbearance, Lizzy.”
Supposing him to be resigned against resolving his dispute so easily, she regretted boasting of her own marital harmony, and though the circumstances were hardly comparable, she found herself saying, “Do not suppose yourself incapable of the same. Grievous though Jane’s indiscretions may be, they must not be allowed to come between you, not after all you endured to be together.”
He made a derisive sound and looked away. “All I endured, indeed!”
“When you were persuaded she did not love you, I meant.”
“I took yourmeaning, and had your sister not graciously informed me two weeks ago that she tricked me into marrying her, I might still have shared the opinion that such was the greatest injustice I have endured.”
Elizabeth stopped walking. “Sir, notwithstanding my present feelings towards her, that is still impossible to credit.”
He shook his head slowly. “You will recall the attitude in which she and I were discovered the day we became engaged.”
“I could scarcely forget it.”
“It was not the happy celebration everybody took it to be.” He blew out his breath and rubbed the back of his neck. “Moments before that, Jane swooned, or so I thought. She fell in such a way as toppled us both to the sofa.”
Elizabeth made a noise of protest, but he interrupted.
“She has admitted doing so by design. Then she… pardon me…then she kissed me.”
“Why would she do such a thing? And, pardonme, but why would you object?”
He appeared confused by this and turned back to the path. “I like your method of walking off vexation. Might we continue?”
She consented, and they walked for two hundred yards at least in silence before he ventured to speak again.
“Your sister’s demeanour was altered when I returned to court her after Easter.” He paused to heave a heavy sigh. “What with all the other unpleasantness and distractions that occurred during those weeks, I…well, suffice to say that by June, I had begun to question my wishes. It seems she perceived my indecision and conspired with her mother to act. Mrs Bennet has freely acknowledged our being interrupted at that moment was deliberate.”
“I do not recall that it happened in that way. My mother tried to prevent our going in.”
He looked unsure for a moment but then dismissed it. “It scarcely matters. By then, Jane had thrown herself upon me, and it was assumed by everybody that we had reached an understanding.”
“But why did you not explain the situation to my father? Or—very well, perhaps not him—but to Darcy.”
“I could not tell Darcy!” He seemed to regret his tone and in a calmer voice added, “Not even he could have extricated me without severely injuring your sister’s reputation. Or yours. Besides, I was not deficient in any feeling for your sister. I believed—I hoped we might be content.” In a pitiable voice he concluded, “I knew not then how embittered she would become.”
If Jane had indeed condescended to despicable means to secure an offer, condemning herself to a marriage of vastly unequal affection, then Elizabeth hardly wondered that she should have grown jealous ofhergenuine happiness with Darcy. The injustice of punishing her for it with malice and disloyalty was insufferable. “I am very sorry for you,” she told Bingley. “I understand now why you wished to leave.”
“May I…do I ask too much to stay on a little longer?”
“You are more than welcome. You must return only when you are ready and not because anybody has forced you, no matter how my mother begs me to try.” Thinking of her mother and father, she added, “There can be nothing more wretched than being unable to respect one’s partner in life. I refuse to have any part in committingyouto such a fate.”
He did not reply for a time. When Elizabeth gave up gloweringfiercely at the lake and looked at him, she was surprised to find him watching her with some concern.
“Would that I could offer you such words of comfort as you have given me, Lizzy.”
How she pitied him then, for she had Darcy to ease the pain of Jane’s betrayal. He had nobody. “Perhaps we can be of comfort to each other,” she offered and was pleased to see his expression lighten. Her anger was too great to accommodate much in the way of comfort at that moment, however, and she sought to end their tête-à-tête by suggesting they return to the house before breakfast was cleared away. The prospect of food persuaded him to abandon the subject, and they returned indoors without taxing themselves to discuss anything more significant than the whereabouts of the other members of the household.
