“Indeed,” Darcy replied absently. “Unlike me.”
Before Elizabeth could decide whether she ought to be offended, he continued in a more serious tone. “It is true that I never intended to marry Anne. But I have, all my life, believed I must marry a woman of fortune. I have been brought up to view wealth, consequence, and connexions as the only markers of a match worth consideration.” He cast her a wry glance. “Utter nonsense, of course, but it took a while for your lessons to sink in.”
“It is not entirely nonsense,” she replied, cautious, for she knew not to where his reflections tended. “There are few people who can afford such an imprudent marriage as the one upon which you are about to embark.”
“You misunderstand me, Elizabeth. That was not my meaning. You talk of Bingley being happy in his marriage, and I am sure he will be, but his happiness can never be as great as mine, precisely because it was always assured and therefore, less worth the earning.
“I have never depended upon securing the same for myself. It was not a notion that ever gave me any distress. I always hoped I would be able to respect my wife, but ever since I was old enough to comprehend that Imustmarry, I presumed the arrangement would be formed of necessity, an alliance designed to benefit Pemberley and my family as much as myself.”
He looked at her, his smile magnificent. “Never did I imagine I should love my wife as dearly as I love you. In truth, you make me feel such happiness when I am with you that everything I have previously donewithoutyou seems miserable in retrospect. Now, when I go home, I might choose to read a book in my library, as I have done a thousand times before, but withyoureading yours next to me. I shall undoubtedly walk around the lake again, only this time arm in arm withyou. If I sit quietly by the fire in my room, I shall enjoy the peace infinitely better than I ever have, for I shall haveyouin my arms. I shall continue to do all the things I have always done and more, only now I shall do themwith you. I cannot express my anticipation to begin.”
Elizabeth stopped walking and waited for him to face her. “You expressed it better than you think.”
She had heard plenty of women boast of the parties and balls, jewels and gowns, houses and carriages their new husbands had promised to lavish upon them once they were wed. That Darcy spoke not of how he would embellish their marriage with trinkets but of how she would enrich his life merely by being in it proved what importance she was to him and made his affection every moment more valuable. She wished she could think of anything half so wonderful to say in return, but any eloquence she might ordinarily have claimed was presently lost beneath the powerful swell of warmth suffusing her entire person. She floundered briefly, but as she contemplated the man who would be her husband, her protector, her dearest friend, and her lover, the man presently regarding her as though she were the most precious creature in all the world, she found that words were easy to come by.
“I love you, Fitzwilliam.”
His eyes widened slightly and then, endearingly, he frowned a little, as though in disbelief. Both were forgot when he kissed her. She was not quite as surprised and marginally better informed than the previous time, but no less affected by his embrace, which was heavenly, by his lips on hers, which were divine, and by his devotion, so apparent in the carefulness of his caresses and the unmistakable strength of his restraint.
She had worried there would persist an awkwardness between them until time and familiarity could overcome it. She need not have been concerned. The intensity of her sentiments was increased by therightnessof them, making his arms feel the most natural place for her to be in all the world. His closeness no more embarrassed her than his stares ever had, and she would happily admit now that she savoured both. Ifhefelt any discomfort, he was doing an admirable job of disguising it.
“Where did you learn my name?” Darcy whispered, still so close that his lips brushed against hers when he spoke.
“I cannot remember now. I only recall thinking how well it suited you. Do you mind me using it?”
He gave her a rather devilish, lopsided grin. “Did it seem as though I objected?”
She hiccupped a little laugh and shook her head.
He inhaled deeply and let it out slowly, his smile fading as he exhaled. “On the subject of objections, I can go no further without mentioning to you that some of my relations may not be in favour of our marriage.”
“If Miss de Bourgh’s opinions are any indication of what the rest of your family will think, then we can safely assume none of them will approve,” she replied, disagreeably sobered.
Regrettably, though she preferred not to be judged on it, Elizabeth could not deny that the chasm between their stations in life did exist. It was a chasm that she sincerely doubted anyone related to an earl would be desirous of bridging.
“Some of them will approve very much,” Darcy insisted. “My sister particularly. And Anne is less opposed than you might expect. But there are others on whose support we cannot depend.”
“That is more likely to give you distress than me. I am exceedingly sorry that marrying me will bring discord between you and any of your family, but if you can bear it, then I most certainly can. They will not frighten me away, if that is what concerns you.”
He gave her an extraordinary look, a mixture of pride and ardour that did something quite delightful to his features. “My object in broaching the matter was to assure you of my protection and constancy in the face of any unpleasantness, but I shall not deny that it is a relief to hear you say as much.”
She reached for his hand and looked solemnly into his eyes. “And I hereby promise you the same protection.” She grinned at his puzzled frown. “From my mother when she discovers you are to be her son. There is guaranteed to be a spectacle.”
Oh, how she loved it when he laughed! It was always the most gratifying surprise.
“I have grown rather fond of your mother’s theatricals.” He tugged their joined hands so that she bumped gently into him, then he kissed her cheek. “I shall consider it a slight if she does not at least gasp when she hears the news.”
“I have no notion what she will do. I am dreading it. I am beginning to wonder whether this is the real reason I asked you to wait to announce anything—because I harbour a deep, unacknowledged hope that she will exhaust all her raptures on Jane and Mr Bingley and have none left with which to mortify us.”
He ran his thumb along her jaw. “I am as impervious to being frightened away as you, but if anythingwereto offend me, it would hardly be your mother’s enthusiasm for our marriage. It is my aunt’s resistance to it that will present the difficulty.”
“Lady Catherine?”
He nodded, and with a heavy sigh, set them back off along the path. “It seems that she, too, has long believed I seriously intended to marry her daughter, a misapprehension I bitterly regret not comprehending sooner, but the damage is done, and it cannot be helped.”
“I thought you said your cousin has decided against you anyway?”
“She has, but there was nothing to be gained by allowing my aunt to believe I would have married Anne even if shehaddesired it. Thus, she is furious with both of us.”
