“Rewind, Levi,” I grind out. “Because I heard more than that.”
“I bet you did because it wasn’t the first time. But she threw some time in between each so that I didn’t lose my shit.”
“Like?”
“A few races, she tried to rub up on my cock. Another party, she reminded me you were fucking Torin Wildes. Told me in great detail how you were low-key about it, but she could see you glowing.”
Stupid fucking bitch.
“Let’s just say…” Levi imparts gruffly. “I was pissed.”
My stomach drops. “Which led you to do what?”
“Fucking a redhead against a brick building so I could get you out of my mind.”
I hate the goddamn honesty.
But, once again, we had a line. We broke through the line. However, it’s still a foggy and barely spoken about subject.
“I told Nessa I wasn’t going to fuck her.” Levi continues on his own. “Not only would I not do that to you, but we both know she isn’t my type.”
“She’s ratchet enough.”
“She’s notyouenough,” he drones evenly. “There’s no faking it, Astor. I belonged to you in a world that only gave me that fate and option. I’d fuck to get off, but there’s no woman I’ve wanted as much as I crave you. It didn’t matter how many stupid assholes you let inside…you were always going to be mine. It was just a matter of when and how hard you were going to fight me on it.”
My pulse vibrates in tandem with his words. The way he was and is so sure. “And if I fought?”
“I don’t see you fighting.” His voice sounds closer then, sending a delirious buzz through my body. “I told Nessa to get fucked, and I was never giving you up. It didn’t matter how she felt about it, what she didn’t want to come of it…you are every star in my sky, and I wasn’t going to fuck your friend to sway shit otherwise. I didn’t want her. I wanted you. And that’s all I’ve seen for as long as I can remember.”
“Why didn’t you stop me from dating Matteo?”
“You don’t remember all the fights we had?”
“I do, I just?—”
“Some lessons can’t be taught, Astor. You hid him hitting you for years. You kept it from me. I swear, I had an inkling, but you covered it so I wouldn’t kill him, didn’t you?”
I swallow. “At the time…yeah.”
“And when you broke up with him?”
“You were there.”
“The only reason he’s not dead, Astor, is because Roger gave me strict orders to stand down. Said he’d handle it. But your bitch of an ex knows how to stay in the dark. There’s only one time Roger allowed me off my leash to get to him, and I killed six of his guys and burned his little house down.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Tell you I failed?” He scoffs a little. “I’ve failed you enough, don’t you think?”
I frown. “No, you haven’t.”
“I have. In a lot of ways. I told you to get involved with the Forsaken Boys to play a game. I threw my girl out to make choices I didn’t think you’d have to make, and then you got knocked up by one of them. I practically whored you out. I gave up my best friend for the sake of a town we should’ve left already.”
“Lev, I agreed to help you. To take Emilio down?—”
“I didn’t have to give you up. I could’ve found another way.”
“I was the best option. It was our only play.”
