I’m alive, miraculously, thanks for asking. I just checked and it’s 2 AM there, why are you awake? I Hope you are alive too – wait that’s dumb because if you weren’t you wouldn’t be emailing me right now. Unless you’re undead, but that would make you a vampire – are you a vampire?? Because if you were, I think I’d be oddly okay with it. Will you be the Edward to my Bella and feed my childhood fantasy?
P.S: trust me when I say I know that family can be exhausting.
TO:Armani Nnandi
FROM: River Kennedy
SUBJECT: Debunking the vampire conspiracy
I am awake because I can’t sleep like I explained that one time, it’s a lingering side effect of getting off antidepressants after an entire year. Hopefully, it stops soon, I’ve only been off them for a few months or so. But I don’t want to bore you with the many unfortunate details. How are things with your mom?
P.S: If I was a vampire trust me when I say you would know. Also, who are Edward and Bella?
TO:River Kennedy
FROM:Armani Nnandi
SUBJECT: The joys of being the family disappointment
Link: tipstobeatinsomnia//cosmomag.org
^^ I hope this helps you get some rest.
My mom is insufferable, and she and my Kenyan aunties have been breathing down my neck the entire time about how they need to find me a “Good African man.” I wish things didn’t have to be so hard. I wish things could be easier for us. But I don’t think that in a world like this, easy was ever even an option... I don’t think I’m coming back after the break.
PS: you haven’t watched Twilight? Blasphemy!
TO:Armani Nnandi
FROM: River Kennedy
SUBJECT: I’ll wait for you
I know she will come around, she has to. Sometimes these things just take time. And if she doesn’t I’ll teleport to Jacksonville and we can go someplace our suffocating families will never find us. Um just give me a minute to figure out the science behind teleportation and quantum physics.
Currently: calculating and breaking the laws of time and space for you.
TO:River Kennedy
FROM:Armani Nnandi
SUBJECT: Is this a parallel universe or did you just make a joke?
Thanks for being positive enough for the both of us, Lord knows, at least one of us needs to be. My brother is starting to get suspicious at why I’ve been smiling at the screen for the past 15 minutes. He's flipping through a catalogue of some special. [quite frankly really expensive] toy train that my parents couldn’t possibly afford to buy him. It makes me sad because I know what it’s like to want, to long for things that are so far out of reach, especially as a kid. I would buy it for him myself but my account is joined to my parents and It’s frozen because my mom is mad at me :/
I hit send on the keyboard and then my bedroom door swung open and I turned off my computer. It was mama.
"What are you two doing upstairs, come back down and help me and your aunties prepare for tomorrow, this is no time to sleep. You will rest when you are dead." She beckoned and Jaadi laughed and we both headed back downstairs.
I walked outside and found papa seated on the porch swing and he gestured for me to sit down next to him and I did just that, papa wasn’t as young as he once was and I thought the moment I realised that was also the moment I realised that I was growing up. It was like It wasn't so long ago that I was five years old and when he lifted me up in the air I felt like it was the highest place in the world. And now here we are seated in silence on the porch swing, we no longer speak the same language and I'm no longer in tune to his song.
I didn't have my mother's eyes, I had my father's, the same curious and dark sunken eyes that held a sense of wanderlust that couldn't be tamed. Papa sighed and began to speak,
"I have gotten the sense that you and mama are not on the best terms as of now, I may not know what this is about but I assume he has a name- what is it?" Papa asked and my breath hitched but I was so tired of lying, so I decided to be honest with him,
"River Kennedy." I told him, "An artist."
"I am not as traditional as your mama, I know that sometimes life happens and we give our hearts to the most unexpected people. I won't tell you to leave him behind, I will only tell you that I trust your judgement and I know that you are responsible and you know how to read people's intentions well. And if you feel he is worthy of your heart then I trust you." Papa told me and I leaned onto his shoulder and let go of a breath I didn't even realise I was holding,
