"Good luck!" Keomi called as I was heading out the door with my painting covered with a thin white sheet, "But then again I also wished River good luck so I think that I'm cheating in a way-"
“I always knew you were two-faced.” I joked, closing the door.
The Paris museum of modern arts was the most beautiful and yet intimidating place I'd ever been, I was surrounded by priceless art by painters who started out just like me. There were statues and critics everywhere silently judging our artwork, it's almost as though they'd mastered the art of keeping a straight face. It was almost impossible to tell whose piece caught their eye.
The good news was that I definitely wasn't overdressed because everyone was dripping with wealth and class. I could've sworn I'd seen the dress Victoria was wearing on the cover of Vogue Paris a few weeks ago. It was a velvety dark green strapless gown with a slit along its side. She was gorgeous and paired with her crimson lipstick she looked like she was in a James Bond movie. Thomas Claud wore a Burberry navy green suit that I'd have to cut off my left leg to even look at, and Elle wore a scandalous Vera Wang formal gown that barely brushed her knees, it was gorgeous.
But as always out of the crowd my eye caught River's, and so help me God it took protest from every bone in my body not to want to kiss him right then and there. River had this timeless, casual beauty about him and it made me want to wish that there was a River Kennedy for every girl through every century, everyone deserved to experience someone so bewitching of the mind, body and soul. He wore an obsidian Valentino suit that made him appear as though he were straight out of an old classic French film.
He looked up from behind his generous pair of eyelashes and smiled with his eyes when he saw me, I was frozen and I didn't know what to do so I just smiled and waved awkwardly. It was crazy how after a month he still managed to get me so flustered and beside myself. Monsieur Etienne called out to us to gather around and I'd assumed that it was time to announce the winner, and I was more than prepared to accept my award, if it were to be given to me.
I stood beside Victoria and her eyes brightened with amusement,
"Nervous?" She asked applying another layer of smooth red lipstick to her full lips,
"I haven't a reason to be," I assured her, and her eyes narrowed with curiosity,
"Is that so?" She questioned, "Don't be so sure of yourself little bird, for there are other creatures with wings just as grand as yours that soar these skies."
I swallowed hard and rolled my eyes at her before stepping forward once the winner's name was announced, but to my great surprise, It was not mine.
It was not my name that slipped past the lips of Eloise Alarie, It was not my painting that caught her eye and it would not be me accepting that award today. I would go home empty-handed.
But River Kennedy would not.
And I wondered if he ever did.
But judging by Victoria's smug knowing grin, I assumed quite the contrary.
"We were enchanted by all of your pieces here today and we thank you, young protégés of St Katherines, for your efforts," Eloise announced, holding up River's painting of The River Seine, and it was only until I looked closer and saw that it was not water that ran through it, but blood. I realised what was so enthralling about it.
It captured the emotion, it captured this scene of Paris that isn't as pretty and perfect as we often picture it to be. It showed a darker side, of gloomy skies and tainted waters that no one dared conquer, no one until him. I took a step back and it felt like I'd suffered a blow to the head and a punch in the stomach. Victoria sighed in pity at me, she knew and she was right this entire time. How could I ever compete with him, he was Monsieur Etienne's prodigy, he was a rare talent and compared to him I was merely ordinary. Compared to River I was nothing, & for the first time in my life, I lost.
And it was then I realised that if everyone else was snow and I was a storm, that River Kennedy was a goddamn hurricane. And I would be a fool to think I could compete.
I felt like the air had been knocked out of my lungs, what would I tell Papa? What would he think of me after I'd lied to him like that, I couldn't let him down like that. I felt like I was having a panic attack and I didn't even notice when River's hand placed itself on my shoulder, his presence was electric and right now I was water and I couldn't handle it.
"Are you okay?" River asked, his eyes held a level of concern I hadn't seen fromanyonebefore, no one had ever looked at me like that.
"I- I just need some air." I told him, I didn't know why but I was angry and he was the easiest person to blame, I wanted him to leave me alone and not rub it in my face that he'd won, "Go claim your inevitable victory, Kennedy."
I shifted away from his touch and he looked slightly hurt- but at this point, it was all too much but I didn’t care. Just then I felt someone grab hold of my hand, and it was Victoria and before I knew it she was leading me away from the scene.
"You've got to get a grip, Armani!" She scolded when we were outside, "If you're going to lose your shit every time you lose to the guy you like, who in this case is Kennedy, this is going to be averylong semester for you."
"It's not fair, I worked so hard to be here." I retorted, "And he- he just-"
"And you think he didn't? You think he just magically appeared here at one of the most prestigious art academies in all of France?" Victoria marvelled, "You're a lot of things but you're not stupid."
I took a deep breath in an attempt to regain my composure.
"I know it hurts to lose, trust me Iknow. I saw you back there, you're entitled to be angry but not at River because he beat you. Only at yourself." Victoria explained and at this point she was out of breath,
“I don’t know what I’m going to do.” I admitted, feeling the frustration melt into hurt, “I told my dad I had already won, he’s going to be expecting to see an award.”
“You do not win for your father, do you hear me?” Victoria insisted, placing both hands on my shoulders, “You don’t win for anyone but yourself.”
“It’s just so hard, having all these expectations on my name.” I confided in her, feeling rather defeated.
