I didn't hurt her. I know that. She asked for it, wanted it rough, wanted me to hold her down because that's how she feels safe with me.
But I saw that bruise and I couldn't separate it. Couldn't separate her from my mother, me from my father.
Mother's gasp. The dent in the drywall. Her flinching when he'd reach for the salt.
So I ran. Took away Scout's choice.
Different methods. Same damage.
Sleep won't come. I just lie there watching the sky through Finn's dirty window, waiting for dawn.
The sun comes up slow, orange spreading through the sky.
Finn emerges from his bedroom around six. He takes one look at my face, at his couch where I've clearly been awake all night, and doesn't say anything. Just goes to make coffee.
His lip's swollen. Cheek bruised. I did that.
"You talk to her?" he asks, setting a mug in front of me.
"No."
"You gonna?"
"Today." The word comes out hollow.
He touches his split lip gently and winces.
"Sorry."
"I've taken worse." He takes a long drink of coffee and watches me over the rim. "She deserves to know why you lost your shit."
"I know."
We finish our coffee in silence.
Chapter 13
Holt
The shop's still dark when I pull into the lot. I have been practicing all night what I am going to say.
Scout, we need to talk.No—sounds like I'm breaking up with her.Can we talk?Too passive.I need to explain—
Her light's on.
I kill the engine and just sit there, staring up at that yellow square in the predawn gray. She's awake. This is it. I'll go up there, knock, and—
My phone buzzes.
REMINDER: Mandatory supplier certification workshop TODAY 9AM at Mesa Distribution Center. Ward & Weller Auto registered for parts specialist demo. Attendance required for account status.
I read it twice. Three times. Press my forehead against the steering wheel and breathe through the urge to put my fist through the dashboard.
Fucking automated reminder. I'd completely forgotten about this—signed up months ago when the account rep mentioned it might get us better pricing.
I've been sleeping on Finn's couch, rehearsing this conversation, and the universe just gave me a mandatory fucking workshop.
The loft door opens. Scout comes down the stairs in her usual work clothes—cut-offs, tank top, hair already pulled back—and she doesn't look at me. Doesn't even glance at the truck as she crosses to the shop entrance.
