“Are you ever going to tell me?”
Yes. When we get there.He's said a variation of those words every time I’ve asked him for the last three hours and twenty minutes. I may or may not be obsessively watching the time on my phone, so I can figure out where we’re going before we actually get there.Relax, Love. We’ll get there when we get there.
Hunter is so chill, it almost makes me crazy. But then I remind myself that it’s what I love about him, because nothing about me is chill. If I’ve learned anything about Hunter in the last few weeks, it’s that life is best for him when there are no bumps or ripples. He can handle problems, but he’s a peace guy. He likes things chill. I, on the other hand, have had an obsession with trying anything and everything. Now that I have my life back, I can’t help but live each and every day to the absolute fullest. I’ve drunk my weight in iced coffees since I started being able to enjoy food again, and I can’t tell you how many pastries, cookies, and treats Hunter has bought for me. I’ve probably gained twenty pounds in the last few weeks. I bemoan that part, but I can’t find the willpower to stop eating. Everything, and I mean everything, tastes so incredibly good. Even the most basic things are amazing. The first morning I ate a piece of toast, I got tears in my eyes.Tears.But I couldn’t help it. Just being able to enjoy anything is such a gift, and I find myself appreciating every single thing in my life. When I tell Hunter I’m going to gain somuch weight, he just shrugs and says it’s more for him to love. Well, he also says a few other things that I can’t repeat, because they make me blush just thinking about them. But life has been good. So. Very. Good. There are still a lot of things to figure out. Nobody’s been able to track down Alicia, and that’s a little scary to think about. But I’m choosing to just focus on the good. And when there’s so much good to be found, who has time to focus on the negative? I close my eyes and let the sun wash over my face. Feeling the sun on my face is also something I will never take for granted again. I’ve spent more time outside than in, I think.
The plane descends, and I stare out the window, trying to look for anything familiar that would mark where we are. As soon as we come to a stop, Hunter stands next to me. “Ready?”
I put my hand in his, and he pulls me to my feet and into his arms. I no longer stiffen. I’m so used to being in his arms, I wonder how I ever functioned before. He’s been so good to me. We’vebeen officially mated for two months now. He arranged for a private ceremony for just him, me, Bryce, Ava, and Ryan. It was beautiful. Ava helped do my hair and makeup, and I wore a simple white gown with a scoop neck and soft white satin. It was so beautiful. After the ceremony, Hunter and I went back to our house, and I changed into a fun white dress that was much shorter and not nearly as modest a neckline. Hunter really liked that dress for all of about two minutes before it found its way to the floor.
He takes my hand in his and leads me down the steps. I look around, still trying to figure out where we are. “Are you ever going to tell me?”
“You’re smart. You’ll figure it out.”
It's not until we’re in the rental car, leaving the airport, that I see the signs. My eyes widen, and my stomach tightens. “We’re in Chicago.”
He squeezes my hand. “Yes.” He turns on the music, and I stare out the window as we drive. I know exactly where we’re going, and I’m not sure how I feel about it. As if he can feel my unease, which he probably can through our bond, he turns to me. “I want you to show me where you grew up.” He waits a beat. “But only if you want to. Say the word, and I’ll turn us around right now.”
“No, I want to do this.”I think.I stare out the window and take in the sights. I can’t believe how much has changed, and yet, there are so many things that are still the same. There’s the outlet mall my mom and I used to shop at. We eventually take the exit for Rockford, and my stomach tenses up. I can’t believe we’re doing this. “How do you even know where to go?” I ask quietly after a little while.
“Leo.”
He doesn’t say anything more, but he doesn’t have to. Leo is a stinking computer genius. I stare at the restaurants and stores that my mom and I used to shop at. Some places are new, and some are still the exact same all these years later. We cross the bridge, and I stare out the window as so many thoughts run through my head. I see the park I used to play at. It’s been upgraded to a much brighter, more modern park. I see the gas station on the corner where I used to buy candy with my money. And then we turn down the street we used to live on. Memory after memory assails me, and I’m not sure I can do this.
“I’m right here with you,” he says quietly.
Hunter slows, and I see the small brick two-bedroom house we used to live in. I wait for the awful memories of that night to hit, but they don’t. I’m able to keep them away and focus on the years I had with my mom. I stare at the backdoor, almost like I’m waiting for my mom to come out. “That’s the tree I used to climb,” I finally say softly.
“Yeah?” Hunter glances at me and then back at the house.
“My mom would get so frustrated with me because I was always blowing through clothes by getting holes in them. I was a little bit of a tomboy back then.” I take in the house next door and smile. “That was Shelley’s house,” I say, pointing at the yellow house next to the brick one. “We would be outside all day, every day, until we got called in for the night. She and I had so many adventures together. We went to the same school, too.”
“Tell me about her,” Hunter says quietly.
“She was quiet, unassuming, but she had a wild side to her that nobody saw. I was always blamed for everything, but nine times out of ten, it was Shelley who had suggested whatever crazy thing we were caught doing. My mom worked at the hospital and often worked the night shift. Then she would sleep during the day, so I had lots of free time on my hands.”
We sit there a little while longer before Hunter pulls away. “Where to next?” he asks.
“I don’t know.”
“I want to know all about your childhood. Where did you go to school? What library did you visit? What was your favorite fast food? Where did you get your groceries?”
I face him. “Are you sure?”
He squeezes my hand. “Baby, I'm behind fourteen years of your life. Catch me up.”
And so I do. We drive to all my favorite places. We hit the By the Dozen Bakery that still has the best Long John donuts you’ll ever eat in your entire life. We drive past my elementary school, and I show him the slide where I was pushed off by Tyler, my nemesis. We drive past the library, where my mom and I would attend story hour. When it’s lunch time, we eat at Taco Johns, still the best place to get tacos. I introduce him to potato oles dipped in nacho cheese sauce. He’s pretty impressed with how many potatoes I can put away. I show him where the mall used to be, which was torn down, and where my old piano teacherlived. We drive past my middle school and get out and walk the track, arm in arm, where I ran my last race. I rest my head on his shoulder as the sun starts to set. “Thank you for this, Hunter.”
“Come here.” He takes my hand and leads me over to the bleachers. We climb to the top row and sit facing the sunset. He wraps an arm around me and pulls me close into his side. Neither of us says anything as we watch the sun go down. That’s one thing about the Midwest; the sunsets are always magical. As I watch the sun set and think through today, I feel like this chapter of my life is able to close. And I can finally look back on my life here with fondness, all because of the man next to me. I don’t have the words to tell him how much today meant to me.
Thank you.I can’t even speak the words out loud because of the lump in my throat. Somehow, though, he just knows.
Only when the sun has completely set, and the cold starts to set in, does he stand to his feet and put out a hand to me. We walk hand in hand back to the car. “I say we find a coffee shop to get something warm to drink. What do you think?”
“The fact that you have to ask means you must not know me all that well yet,” I say with a smirk.
“Oh, I know you. That’s why I already have the directions to the coffee shop pulled up on my phone,” he says, squeezing my hand. When we sit at the table with our coffees, Hunter pulls out a pack of UNO. I grin and push my coffee to the side. “Ready to get smoked?” he asks.
I lean forward. “Oh, it’s on, Wolf.”
