“Pastures.”
“Pastures, fields—same difference, Daddy.”
“That sounds an awful lot like a spy.” It was entirely too early to explain the massive difference between them. Fields grew. Pastures raised.
“Noooo,” he said with a cheeky laugh, “I gotta watch ’cause what if you fall and hurt yourself.”
“Fall off the ATV?”
“It could happen. Then you’d be sad and dirty and scared.”
“I’m pretty sure I’d be more mad than scared, sugar.” This conversation was too much in the morning. It didn’t matter that I’d been getting up before five-thirty my whole life. Still fucking hated it. I was born to be a night owl and destined to be an early riser.
“If you say so, Daddy.” His sing-song tone was sparkly and twinkling and…grating?
I groaned into my pillow. “Are you always so, uh, cheerful in the morning? It’s just early.” My intended tone was conversational, but I missed that mark by a wide mile.
All that sunshiny happiness that had burst into the room dulled very quickly at my words. Goddammit, I should’ve kept my fucking mouth shut. Where Jasper had been tugging at my hand as it lay across the bed, he immediately let go and scooted back. I felt the loss of his touch in a way I didn’t even know how to describe. The loss was sharper than it had any right to be.
“I’m sorry. Sometimes I forget that not everyone’s a morning person.” Jasper’s voice was halting and jerky, forced. A moment ago, he’d been in his happy-go-lucky little space, and the abrupt departure from that was entirely on me.
I was an absolute asshole in the morning.
“Sugar, come back, please.” I waggled my fingers at him, enticing him across the bed like I was trying to coax in a skittish colt. His hesitancy made me want to kick my own ass. “I’m sorry, Daddy is growly in the morning.”
“You kinda are, Daddy. It’s not nice.”
“You’re right, and I’m sorry. I’ll try and do better.”
At my apology, Jasper sat back on his haunches. His expression was thoughtful as he calmly contemplated me. I held my breath while I watched emotions play across his face. After a few beats, Jasper gave a decisive nod and pounced on me with a snuggly hug.
Thank god. I wrapped my arms and legs around him. He was imprisoned in my clutches. He didn’t seem to mind too much since his giggles spilled out around the room.
“And you are absolutely right to wake me up, sugar. If it’s seven o’clock, then I’ve got animals who’d very much like to be fed this morning.”
“If you want, I can help. I gotta feed my goat-a-roonies.”
“You want to help?” Jasper was enamored with his small herd of goats, but he hadn’t shown a lot of interest in my animals. This might have been the first time he mentioned them.
“Yeah, but I allowed?”
“Why wouldn’t you be allowed?”
“’Cause they special.”
“Special?”
“Yeah, Daddy. They’re the extra-special ones, Daddy. The kind for labs and schools and stuff.” I craned my neck back to look at him properly. He hadn’t dropped back into the little space that I’d jerked him out of. Jasper continued, “I look at ’em, but I know I gotta stay away.”
“Sweetheart, is that why you’ve never asked about them?”
“Yeah. You said not yours,” Jasper agreed with an earnest nod. “’Member? You told me.”
“When you brought me the coffee?” Jasper nodded in agreement. “I do remember saying something about them not being mine, but I’ll introduce them to you if you want. A couple are ornery, but there are a few sweethearts too.”
“Daddy might think the goat-a-roonies are the cutest goats in the world, but I think these are the cutest sheep I’ve ever seen. Look at that face. She’s so pretty.”
Jasper had spotted the gray-and-white sheep with his face sandwiched between his hands. His delighted giggles teased the edges of my heart. The old saying about can’t miss what you never had was manifesting in front of me. Now that I’d experienced the pure joy that Jasper leaned into, there’s no way I could return to my previous stark existence.
