Cole carrying two fully loaded hot chocolates a few minutes later is a sight I’m not sure I’ll ever forget.
As he moves, his reflection in the floor-to-ceiling windows catches my eye.
“Do you ever use your balcony?” I blurt.
Every day it taunts me, but I’ve yet to venture out there.
“Not as much as I should. I always end up here with the TV on. Would you like to go out?”
“Yes,” I state, surging to my feet and grabbing the blanket that’s thrown over the back of the couch. “Oh, is this okay?” I ask before dragging it outside. It might be special or something.
“Yeah, Whirlwind. It’s okay.” After placing one mug down, he unlocks the balcony before taking them both out.
The cool evening air rushes over me as I follow him, but it feels incredible.
We get settled on his swing seat. It’s nowhere near as big as his couch inside, and we end up so close we’re almost touching. I shake the blanket out so it covers both of us and settle in. Cole passes me my mug, and I cup it with both hands, letting thewarmth of it relax me. The seat rocks as he shifts beside me, also getting comfortable.
I gaze out over the city, wondering how hanging out with a famous hockey player has become my life. It’s so different to the life I lived before. Sure, I was surrounded by famous people then as well. But they lived for it. They wanted their name in lights, wanted everyone to know who they were. Cole…he just wants to do a job he loves.
“I met my ex when I was in Vegas. He came into the bar I worked in and…well, he blew me away. He was everything girls want in a guy. Good looking, popular, talented, and he had this way of looking at me that made me feel like I was the only girl in the world.”
I don’t know where the words come from or why I choose now to say them, but they spill free regardless. And beside me, Cole just listens.
“He was in Vegas for a few weeks finishing up his new album, and when I wasn’t working, he took me along to everything he could. I was in awe. Watching him record, experiencing his fans’ reaction to him in clubs. At that point in my life, I’d vaguely heard of him, but I wasn’t a fan as such.
“It didn’t take long for him to completely take over my life, though.
“He invited me on tour with him, and I quit my job and followed him all around the world. It was wild. I saw places I never thought I would. Met the most incredible people. Some I’m still star-struck by today.”
I pause as I think of some of those people. Some I even considered friends at the time. It’s funny how easily fooled you can be by someone, because I haven’t heard a single word from those “friends” since walking away.
I only existed as Rowan’s girlfriend.
Now, I’m nothing.
And that almost stings as much as the way he dropped me like an old, worn-out pair of sneakers. Almost.
“What changed?” Cole whispers, almost as if he’s afraid to speak.
“Everything. Nothing. It wasn’t one thing. I think it just got to the point one day that it all became too much. And the more I took a step back and really looked at the way I was being treated, the more I started resenting all of it. Him.
“He kept telling me that I should be grateful for the opportunity. And I was. But the closer I looked, the more I realized he didn’t want me there, not really. I served a purpose, just like everyone else who followed him around like lost lambs.
“I was going to leave. I knew it was the way forward. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt when his assistant told me that they were all moving on and that my airline ticket was for a different flight to a different location.”
“He didn’t even tell you himself?” Cole balks.
“Why would he when he has people running around, more than willing to do his dirty work?”
“Have you spoken to him since?”
I shake my head. “I packed up my stuff and left while he was at rehearsal, and that was that.”
“Shit, Freya.”
“Yeah,” I muse, my insides twisted up with a mixture of shame, regret, and heartache.
I loved him. And I thought he loved me. I should have known it was all for show.
