She has to do it. So I don’t answer as I help her to the pulpit.
Because today, we marry.
Her fate and mine—for better, for worse—are joined together.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Sasha
I don’t knowwhat scares me more. Marrying Ryker or allowing him to see the real me.
Even my father found my peculiarities trying and he made it absolutely clear that I was his least favorite child.
The same traits that made me easy to control also made him treat me with complete disdain.
It wasn’t just my lack of strength, it was the way my fears seemed to overwhelm me. Like right now.
It isn’t that I shouldn’t be afraid.
Ryker is the kind of man that could make any sane woman tremble in fear. He’s made it clear that what he wants is something from me.
What I cannot do is let my anxiety get in the way of what I want. Freedom.
If I can just control the fear, I can figure out what he wants and figure out how I can untie this knot.
Granted, marriage is a pretty big knot. Then again, I don’t plan to leave Vegas as Sasha. I’ve still got the passports stashedunder my mattress and none of those women are married to a conniving billionaire.
His hand is firm around my waist as the pastor’s words float past my ears, none of them sticking.
It’s always been this way. I’m lost in my own thoughts, and I can’t attend a word of what’s being said.
Until we have to begin saying vows.
“I promise to love, honor, and cherish…” Ryker’s deep baritone pulls me from the place I’d retreated deep inside, and I find myself focusing on him. I tip my head to look into his eyes.
At least, in this moment, they don’t have that deep black look that never fails to frighten me.
But I can’t be fooled. And I can’t allow him to see how much he affects me. My whole life, I’ve been controlled by hard men and I just need…
A bit of room to breathe and to just be. Find myself. Feel safe.
Maybe if I could have a moment where it wasn’t a crisis, I could learn how to live without the constant worry that makes me raw.
But I’m so far from that right now, being held by a man who has promised revenge, being tied to him.
When my turn comes to repeat the vows, I can hardly get out the words. “Honor. Cherish.” Can anyone even hear me? Does it matter?
But the last words rock me. “Until death do us part.”
I tremble as they leave my mouth. I am making a vow. One that is the very opposite of everything I want.
What I know I need.
“By the power vested in me by the state of Nevada, I now pronounce you, husband and wife.”
Ryker bends down then, his lips brushing over mine. They are strong but soft, warm and filled with purpose. It shocks me how pleasant his mouth is, how… generous.
I don’t kiss him back.
