I stared at him, processing this unexpected statement. “The right—wait, do you have a bookish crush?” A grin spread across my face. “Holy shit. I wondered why you kept agreeing to going back! Kept bitching that you hated it, but really you were crushing hard.”
“Fuck off,” he growled, but the color rising on his neck told me I’d hit something true. “I don’t have a crush on anyone. I’m just saying if we’re going to keep up this stupid TikTok thing, we might as well target someone worthwhile, not just any random chick who happens to buy dirty threesome books.”
My attention snagged on his phrasing. “That’s kind of specific.”
Xavier’s expression froze for a fraction of a second, almost imperceptible if I hadn’t known him for years. “Whatever. You know what I mean.”
I didn’t know what he meant, but before I could push further, Aimee’s voice cut through the tension between us.
“We’re taking calls now on The Aimee Position,” she announced. “If you’ve had a threesome experience, good or bad, or if you have questions about making your fantasy a reality, give us a call!”
An idea hit me with the force of a perfectly timed downshift. I grabbed my phone, hitting the call button displayed on the podcast app before I could think better of it.
“What are you doing?” Xavier asked, watching me with suspicious eyes.
“Getting expert advice,” I said, switching the call to speaker. My heart pounded as the ringtone sounded, once, twice, three times.
“You’re on The Aimee Position with Aimee and Dr. Wells. What’s your threesome question?”
I grinned at Xavier, who was now sitting up straight, his eyes widening as he realized what I was doing. He mouthed “what the fuck” at me, but I was already talking.
“Hi Aimee, big fan. This is Milo from Colorado.”
“Hey Milo. You may not know this but I’m in Denver. Love a guest from my home state! What’s your question?”
“So my best friend and I have been hanging out at this bookstore that specializes in romance novels, making content for social media. He’s developed a little crush on a girl who’s into books about threesomes with two guys. Do you think she wants that in real life?”
“Well, hello, Milo from Colorado,” Aimee said finally, a hint of amusement in her voice. “Let’s back up here. Are you interested in a threesome with her?”
Xavier looked like he was thinking about the best way to murder me.
“Maybe. But it’s awkward to just walk up and ask, right? Like she’ll probably think we’re creeps.”
“You and your friend are hanging around a romance bookstore, and you’re wondering how to proposition one of the customers for a threesome? Do I have that right?”
Put that way, it sounded way worse than I’d intended. “No! I mean, not exactly. We’re not, like, actively trying to do that. He’s just crushing hard on this girl—”
“Milo,” Xavier hissed.
“—And if she only reads threesome books, does that mean she only likes threesomes? Because, like, I’m perfectly happy to take one for the team to help him find true love. But I have no idea how to ask her without sounding like a creep.”
“That’s a great question, Milo,” Dr. Wells chimed in. “And it touches on power dynamics that are important to understand. Two men approaching one woman can create an imbalance that might feel intimidating, regardless of your intentions.”
“Right,” I said quickly. “That’s exactly what I was thinking. So it would be better if, like, she initiated it, right?”
“In an ideal scenario, yes,” Aimee agreed. “But that doesn’t typically happen organically. Usually, there needs to be established trust and communication first. Dr. Wells, what would you advise for Milo and his friend?”
“My first piece of advice would be to examine your motivations,” Dr. Wells said. “Are you genuinely interested in a meaningful experience with this person, or is this more about fulfilling a fantasy where this woman is just a prop?”
I felt heat crawl up my face. “No, no, it’s not like that. I mean, he really likes her.” I was digging myself deeper with every word, and Xavier’s rigid posture across the room told me he was never going to let me live this down.
“Milo,” Aimee’s voice took on a more direct tone, “let me ask you something. In this hypothetical threesome with your best friend, would you be comfortable with all aspects of it? Includingpotentially interacting sexually with your friend as well as with the woman?”
I froze, my mouth open but no words coming out. My eyes darted to Xavier, who had turned around at Aimee’s question, his expression a mixture of shock and something else I couldn’t name.
“I—what?” I stammered, suddenly very aware of Xavier watching me, waiting for my answer. “That’s not—we wouldn’t—I mean—”
“It’s a simple question,” Aimee pressed, her voice gentle but persistent. “Many people fantasize about threesomes without considering all the implications. In reality, a threesome with two straight men and one woman often becomes more about the men taking turns than a true three-person experience.”
