“We keep hearing that you’re going to decide,” Leandro said.“What does that even mean?What are you deciding, and why areyouthe one who gets to decide?”
“I did already tell you, but it seems that you need me to expound further.”Nell stepped closer to us, speaking louder and more authoritatively.“I am the Allmother of Fort Lately, and I command over armed Sentries.Under my care, I have hundreds of Reverent and twice as many Revenant.
“The world beyond these walls is sick and hostile, and to keep all of my loved ones safe, I am forced to make difficult decisions,” she continued.“When it comes to dealing with the un-Reverent, there are only five options: Exilation, Execution, Expiation, Exaction, Exbindition.”
As Nell went on, she made sure to look between each one of us, as if forcing us to weigh her words more heavily.“So, outsiders are quarantined while I watch and wait and commune.When I am done, I decide.”
The sickening horror that there was nothing we could do to stop Nell from taking Fae moved into cold certainty.They were going to take my child from me.What mattered now was keeping Fae happy and safe and ensuring that I would be reunited with her again.
I stood up with Fae still cradled in my arms.I kissed the top of her head and walked slowly toward where Nell stood with the guards.When I reached Boden, I stopped and he gently ruffled Fae’s soft hair.
In a low voice, he whispered to me, “We can fight, if that’s what you want.”
“It’s not what’s best for her,” I insisted quietly.Gunfire and getting ripped screaming from my arms sounded far worse than handing her off.
He frowned, then bent down and kissed Fae’s cheek.“We’ll see you soon, kiddo,” he promised her thickly.
I went up to Nell when everything in me wanted to run the other way.
“Her name is Rafaella, after her grandmother,” I explained as tears welled in my eyes.“But we call her Fae.If she gets fussy, she’s hungry, or she wants you to sing to her.”
Nell reached for her, and it took all my will to release her, to actually let go of Fae.
“Nice to meet you, little Fae,” Nell cooed at her with an affectionate smile.“You’re going to have so much fun and make so many new friends.”
As soon as Nell looked up from the baby, her smile evaporated.She ordered the guards to lead her and Dougal out of the barracks.After a brief goodbye between the brothers, Dougal, Nell, the guards, and Fae went out the door.
When the locks clicked shut, I had to bite my lip to keep from screaming.Boden pulled me into his arms, and I sobbed into his chest as he stroked my hair.
“We’ll get her back,” he promised me, and I believed him, because ithadto be true.
25
Stella
“What precisely does Nell mean by this exilation etcetera?”Boden asked, turning his attention to Alphie once I calmed down and got myself under control.
“And none of this vague bollocks,” Fergus said.“Just tell us straight what is gonna happen when Nell makes her fucking decision.”
“The Five Punishments are to be banished without aid, put to death without remorse, atone without mercy, relinquish without assent, serve without end,” Alphie said.
We’d all formed a loose semi-circle around her, as if she was giving a speech.Her eyes were locked on the wood floorboards creaking under her feet as she shifted her weight.Her arms were wrapped tightly around herself, and the corner of her mouth had a slight twitch.
“The way things are carried out can vary, so I can’t be as precise as you want,” Alphie went on.“Nell has put people to death by beheading them with an ax, hanging them from a rope, burning them at a stake, and stoning them with rocks.Maybe other ways that I don’t remember anymore.”
“So it’s not all peace, love, and harmony?”Fergus asked wryly.
“Why did you say that Fae would be safe with her?”I asked –shoutedin a rage, really.My composure was a very fragile thing, and I felt like I could shatter at any moment.
“We –they…” Alphie grimaced as she tripped up on her own words.“Nell and the Revvers would never hurt a child.She will be cared for, she will be loved.”She paused, as if summoning strength.“Fae is part of the exaction.She has been relinquished without your assent.”
“Nell never means to give her back,” I said, and it wasn’t so much a realization as something I needed to say aloud.
“Exaction is part of it, no matter what else she decides,” Alphie said.“She will take everything from us.Everything that might be of use to her or means something to us will belong to her.We will be left without even the shoes on our feet.”
“What about Dougal?”Fergus asked.“What’s she done with him?”
“It is as she said.Nell doesn’t lie,” Alphie claimed.“He’ll be treated in the Wellness Center.If he returns to health, he’ll face her decisions.If he cannot, he will be put to death.”
