“We met and had a great night. Then resolved not to take it further because neither of us has time for it.”
“And now you have to work with her? Didn’t Kent say she’s going to write a series of pieces for us? What a way to hit the ground running.”
“Listen,” I said, sighing out a frustrated gust of air. “I don’t want to get her into trouble or have anyone think?—”
“Si, come on.” Lee shook his head. “You know me. I’d never say anything. And while I’m giving you shit right now, I’m happy for you.”
“Happy this job got even more complicated for me?” I sputtered out a laugh.
“You’ve been alone for long enough. Blamed yourself for long enough. I like that this woman is putting some wind back in your sails.” He slapped my arm.
I’d been alone long enough for my ex-wife to already be remarried and living a whole new life. Our divorce had only been final for a year, but we’d been living separate lives months before that. When I’d heard a couple of months ago, I hadn’t been upset she’d found someone else, but it had highlighted how stagnant my life had been since we’d split, both professionally and personally.
Other than the afternoon a beautiful woman punched me in the stomach and knocked me on my ass. Seeing her again had only reminded me how I hadn’t recovered.
“I was just surprised to see her, that’s all.” I shrugged, trying for aloof even though Lee would know I was full of shit.
“Well, I was on the pretzel line right next to where they pulled you both aside. Kent was too eager to blow up the Bats on socials to notice all the pining.”
“I’m not pin—” I trailed off when he narrowed his eyes. “I only knew her for a day. A very fucking amazing day. But I can’t.”
“Why can’t you? I don’t get it.”
“I’m on the road all the time. I can’t be anything for anyone right now or maybe ever. I’m over forty, and I’m figuring shit out.”
And still terrified to make a commitment I’d fail at again. Agreeing to see a woman again wasn’t a commitment, but that fear of getting attached to someone and letting them down was too raw and potent to shake off.
“Who isn’t? I’m heading to see my little girl in a few, where she lives with my mother, sister, and brother-in-law because her father has to travel too much for work. Figuring shit out is a process with no time or age limit, and we’ve all got a long way to go, dude.” He slapped a hand on my shoulder. “I’d better get going. You enjoy your interview.”
I had to laugh. Of all the PR events the Bats would make me do, I was certain this was the only one I wouldn’t have to force myself to enjoy.
No matter how I wasn’t supposed to. Because what could come of it? Our situations were still the same, regardless of whether we stumbled upon each other in our daily, real lives now.
Maybe that was why I was looking forward to this so much. After wondering about her for so long, I was happy to finallyget my own answers about Rachel, even if she would be the one interviewing me.
It wouldn’t end the same way as our last meal had. I couldn’t take her back to my hotel room and fuck her until we were both senseless. And if I was going to get through this evening, I’d need to work on forgetting that, along with the already crushing disappointment of walking away—again.
CHAPTER TWELVE
SILAS
I’d headedto Park Slope early, finding a spot around the corner from the restaurant Rachel had suggested. This was definitely a different neighborhood from where we’d first met, the tree-lined streets and little shops giving an urban small-town kind of vibe.
I made my way to the restaurant, adjusting the baseball hat on my head to shield my eyes. After the season officially started, I’d probably have more of a risk of being recognized, but I didn’t want to chance being photographed with a woman and having it go viral like those stupid reels from last season had.
I had to laugh at the weird position I was in. Kent wanted to exploit my popularity, telling me earlier today that my jersey had already been selling well online. But it had nothing to do with my stats or talent. It was about how I looked and what fame I could bring my new team.
I seemed to be the only one focused on wins this season, but I’d have to try to keep that edge of resentment out of whatever I’d tell Rachel. I didn’t doubt I’d sit down and want to spill everything.
“Oh hey. I didn’t expect you to be early too.”
I turned around to find Rachel standing behind me as I made it to the front entrance of the Chinese restaurant.
“I came early to get parking.” I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my jeans, shrugging. “My new truck is around the corner.”
“Wow, brave soul.” I smiled back when her lips curved. “I rent a car when we have to travel outside of the city, but I get to most places on foot or by subway.” She motioned to the restaurant door. “Park Palace is one of our favorites, but we usually get takeout. Eating inside will be a treat.”
Her brown eyes sparkled as they met mine, a deep, bottomless chocolate I could still get lost in.
