Iwassick over her because I loved her. It was a first, and, if this month had taught me anything, she would be the last. Whatever I had planned, for myself or for this place, I always imagined it with her by my side, or else it was hollow, exactly like I felt today.
37
Caterina
A week later
Caterina:Thank you. That was very sweet but you didn’t have to do that.
Joe:Do what? Send soup to my sick girlfriend? Even though she wouldn’t let me drive up and take care of her.
Caterina:I’m fine, Joe. Weak and a little woozy but fine.
All week long, Joe and I planned for what I hoped would be a romantic weekend in my apartment. I couldn’t wait for him to get here until I started throwing up on Thursday, and Friday. Today was the first time in three days I’d managed to swallow anything without the threat of it coming back up.
Joe:I still don’t see why I couldn’t come see you this weekend. I haven’t seen you in so fucking long. I don’t care if you’re throwing up.
Caterina:I care. For two reasons.
Joe:I can’t wait to hear what they are.
Caterina:One, I don’t want you catch this stomach plague I have. And two, I kinda don’t want to ruin the image of me tan and naked on the beach with you on the night before I left. The putrid way I look now would totally erase that from your memory.
Joe:A lobotomy wouldn’t erase that, baby. I hate that I’m not with you this weekend.
Caterina:Trust me. I hate that, too.
Joe:Dominic’s uncle lives in Bay Ridge and swears by the soup at Rino’s. I thought you could use that more than a flower delivery.
Caterina:They do have good soup. I usually get minestrone, but the chicken soup is perfect. I still have to go slow on the noodles.
Joe:My chicken soup is better.
Caterina:I’m sure it is.
Joe:I’d make it for you right now if I was there.
Joe:I’d give anything to be there.
Caterina:I know, baby.
Joe:Baby??
Caterina:Yeah, so? You call me that all the time.
Joe:But, you never called ME that before ;)
Caterina:I’m dehydrated and, like I said, woozy.
Joe:You like me, don’t you?
I loved him, but wouldn’t tell him until he was in front of me. Although, when the soup delivery arrived, enough emotion swept over my weak self to want to call him and blurt it out. Texting was safer in the condition I was in.
Caterina:I hate that you aren’t here, too. But the soup makes it feel like you are.
Joe:Eat, and get some rest.
Caterina:I will. And I do like you. There, I admit it.
