“No, you’re right.” I exhaled a long breath and leaned back in the chair. “Drew has been the best friend I’ve had in . . . ever, probably. I’d been fighting the ‘more than friends’ feeling for months.” Opening up to Josh and Brianna was strange, but oddly easy. “I don’t know why. This is probably all kinds of wrong. He’s younger, too.”
“He’s a nice, great-looking guy. Why is it so wrong to like him? Don’t beat yourself up for being human.”
“You had to throw in the ‘great,’ didn’t you, Bri?” Josh teased as he came up behind her.
Her eyes rolled. “All I’m saying is you shouldn’t be so set against depriving yourself. Anyone would be tempted.”
“Keep digging the hole, Cupcake,” Josh growled as Brianna waved him off.
“But Josh has a point. If you’re unsure, spending so much time with him and Victoria is only going to cloud things more. But for tonight, just have fun. Both of you.” She threw Josh a scowl before leaving the room.
“You’re right.” I let out a defeated sigh. “I need to stop acting like a horny teenager around my daughter.”
“No, that’s not what we were saying. Look,” he dropped a hand on my forearm. “Just have fun tonight. Victoria is excited, and you’ve been icing the same spot of cake for the past ten minutes, so I’m guessing you are too.” I met his gaze and had to laugh. “You deserve some fun.”
Josh left me alone with my over-frosted cake. I hoped my fun wasn’t going to be at everyone’s expense.
“My family is a little nuts. A nice nuts, but nuts all the same,” Drew warned as he led us up the icy front steps. “My cousin has twin nine-year-old boys, Alex and Aiden. They love comics so you’ll all get along fine.” He gave Victoria a wink and squeeze on the shoulder before ringing the doorbell.
“Hey, man!” An older replica of Drew greeted us at the door. “Glad you could make it. The boys are excited to have someone here their age.” He glanced at Victoria over Drew’s shoulder.
“Jesse, this is Sara and Victoria.” Drew wrapped his arm around me as he made introductions. “I told them we’re all crazy, but harmless.”
“More or less,” Jesse agreed with a nod. “My mother may not be harmless, so tread lightly with that one. Especially since my baby cousin over here is her pet.” He motioned to Drew with a smirk.
“Please, Aunt Maria is all bark no bite. Now could we come inside? It’s arctic out here.”
Jesse ushered us in and shut the door behind us, his eyes still focused on Victoria and me. “Drew told me so much about you. All good, I promise. Food is set up in the kitchen.”
I grabbed Drew’s hand and laced our fingers together. Holding hands was new between us, but I reached for him more out of fear than attraction. He locked his eyes with mine and squeezed. Maybe I was older than Drew, but the measly life experience I’d had made me more of a kid than mature adult in a situation like this. I wet my parched lips and followed him inside the living room.
“Everyone, this is Sara and Victoria.” Drew draped his arm around me and squeezed Victoria’s shoulder. She searched the room with wide eyes. She’d come out of her shell a lot more in the past year, but like her mother, overly social situations weren’t her favorite.
It was hard to miss the identical twin boys on the couch. They both focused on the TV screen with blank expressions, only glancing our way for a moment.
“Hey guys,” Drew called out to them. “Why don’t you let Victoria play, too? Or at least blink once in a while.”
“Do you know how?” One of the boys scrunched his face as he studied Victoria. She stepped away from us and turned her head toward the oversized TV screen hanging on the wall.
“I have this game. My dad and I play. We got past this level two weeks ago.” Both boys’ heads whipped in her direction and one offered her his controller.
Drew gave me a side smirk and pulled me down the hallway.
“She’ll be just fine,” he whispered in my ear before kissing the top of my head. Every inch of wall in Jesse’s house was covered with either something sports related or a family photo. The sight of all those pictures made my chest squeeze.
They don’t open them, but I show them.
Denise called back late Christmas Eve, and as much as I hated myself for it, I didn’t pick up. I still wanted my sister, but I couldn’t acknowledge being rejected yet again by a mother who hated me. It was almost worse than when she originally threw me out. I would have thought the years had mellowed her feelings or that maybe she’d even miss me a little or be curious about her granddaughter. None of that was true, and I was still acclimating to the permanence of it all.
I’d bet none of the photos I sent my parents of their granddaughter made it to a frame. I felt pity for both myself and my daughter in that moment. Love of extended family radiated off every crevice of this house upon entry, and it was foreign to both of us.
“Where’s your dad?” I questioned as I took in all the different faces. Faces focused on me, the scrutiny making me uneasy. I clutched on to my cake and hoped his family served alcohol before the ball dropped.
“He took my grandmother back to her assisted living apartment; she’s not one for New Year’s. And I would bet he’s on his way back to Jersey right about now.” Drew shrugged. “At least he stayed around for Christmas.”
I was introduced to so many aunts and uncles, forgetting the onslaught of so many names to remember. They were all kind and welcoming, except for one. His aunt Maria greeted me with a half-smile and a weak handshake, and I could swear she mumbled something to Drew about not running out this time. I guessed Drew leaving them on Christmas didn’t allow me the best chance to make a good first impression.
“Don’t worry about it,” Drew assured me after we dropped the cake off in the kitchen. “I see those wheels turning behind those big eyes.” He kissed my forehead.
