“Hi, Josh,” I whispered. He smelled so damn good. His woodsy cologne mixed with the salty sweat that was always my Josh. Our eyes locked for a long minute as his hand lingered on my belly. Could he feel the butterflies ricocheting back and forth in my stomach against his palm?
A buzz from my purse broke our gaze. I stepped away from Josh and reached into my bag to grab my phone.
SCOTT:I miss you, babe. Hope you’re having fun with the girls.
Damnit.The room became stifling, and I needed air. The pressure from both men in my life was suffocating me.
“Is everything okay, Brianna?” Missy dropped a hand to my forearm.
“Yeah. All good,” I chirped. “I’m going to the ladies’ room a minute. Excuse me.”
I clicked my heels as fast as I could without falling on my ass. I rushed into the bathroom and ran my hand under the sink, letting the cold water run over it and brought it to the back of my neck.
My throat burned, but why? Frustration? Josh crossed over the friend zone and hadn’t a care in the world. It was difficult not to resent him for leaving me there all those years, so obviously pining for him, but all he did was push me away. Even the letters he sent kept me at arm’s length.
A real chance with Josh was all I’d ever wanted. What if things went wrong? I could lose him for good this time. The notion of not having him in my life at all was terrifying. I clutched the edge of the sink, trying to steady my rapid breaths. When I thought of the hold he still had on me—the hold healwayshad—it infuriated me so much my hands shook.
I trudged out of the ladies’ room and scanned the crowd for my friends. Amanda was nowhere to be found, but Reid and Missy were showing off on the dance floor. Josh was in the same seat by the bar, but now he had a friend with him. Christal. She threw her head back and laughed at something he said while tracing the lines of his tattoos with her index finger. His brow furrowed as he watched her ramble on. His shoulders shook with a laugh as she became more and more animated. My hands balled into fists at my sides. She had no right to burrow into his side like she was, even though Josh wasn’t giving her any encouragement. When his head craned around and met my angry gaze, I breathed through my nostrils as I willed myself to calm down.
He. Was. Not. Mine.
Christal and whoever else could touch him, play with his ink, and do whatever they wanted. No matter how much it ate me alive.
I was losing my fucking mind. What I felt for Josh was doing exactly what I feared the most, breaking me until there was nothing left.
“Hey.” Amanda grabbed my arm. She stood right next to her cousin, but I didn’t see her. My eyes zeroed in on Josh, and like Scott so astutely noticed, I didn’t see anything else. “Are you all right?”
“No. I’m not feeling well. I’m going to catch a cab home. You guys have fun.” I turned when a strong hand wrapped around my bicep.
“No, Bri. If you don’t feel well, I’ll take you home.” Josh had stood from his seat and rushed over to me.
I shook my head. “You’re here with Reid—”
“We took separate cars. Come on, I’m parked across the street.” He took my hand and motioned to Reid that he was leaving.
“I hope you feel better, sweetie.” Christal rubbed my shoulder as her blonde brow furrowed. Did she have to be so fucking nice?
We made our way to Josh’s truck. I said nothing as he helped me into the cab and shut my door.
“Do you think you’re going to throw up? I can get a bucket from the back—”
“No, I’m fine. I’m just tired. It’s been a long few weeks.” I gave him a half smile before he started the engine.
“I’ve got you, Cupcake.” He rubbed my thigh and kissed the top of my head.
Yes, he sure did. And the more I fought against it, the more I realized there was nothing I could do about it.
Josh
BRIANNA HADN’T UTTEREDa single word since we stepped into the truck. Tension radiated off her entire body as she faced as far away from me as possible. I knew she was avoiding me. Our near kiss was too much for her to handle right now. I should’ve backed off and let her have her space, and I did for a few days. All we were doing was delaying the inevitable—whether she chose to admit it or not.
“I’m sorry we had to leave so soon. I would have liked to meet more of your friends.” I glanced her way, and Brianna nodded in response, still not looking at me.
“I saw Christal corner you at the bar.” Her voice was aloof but the ticking in her jaw said otherwise as she drew back into the seat.
Sick, my ass.I noticed her glaring at me and Christal tonight. She stared daggers into Christal’s back every time she touched me. She could act as aloof as she wanted. I knew she fucking hated it. My cupcake was in a losing battle with herself. She was going to make herself really get sick if she didn’t surrender soon.
“Yeah,” I chuckled. “Chatty little thing.”
