“Looking sharp, Dad.”
He wore the same uniform I did today. He was a chief now, and at fire department events, he always dressed up to show respect. The kid in me loved that we were dressed the same. He was my hero, and that was something I'd never outgrow.
“Thanks, Jack. What do you think, Ella-Jane?” He pulled her closer. “Am I handsome?”
She craned her neck and rolled her eyes. “You’re irritating.” She planted a quick kiss on Dad’s lips before traipsing out of my room.
“Did she convince you to stay?” Dad laughed as he took her same seat on the bed.
“No, but you have to give her credit for trying. I feel bad, but—”
“Don’t. She understands, and she’ll get used to it. Just don’t disappear, but I know we raised you better than that. Good job on the tie.”
“Took me three tries.” I laughed. “Top button is open, so it’s not so terrible.”
“Good trick.” Dad’s lips ticked up in a smirk. “I have a couple of things for you.”
He rose from the bed and handed me a black box.
“When my father was dying, he asked the Fire Commissioner if he could save his badge number in case one of his grandsons wanted to become a fireman. Because he became sick in the line of service, so to speak, they granted his request. Today, his badge number belongs to you.”
I opened the box, and the gold badge shone at me.
“Three two nine five. Marilyn plays that once a week in the lottery. Came in a couple of times.” Dad chuckled.
“This is . . . I don’t know what to say. You sure David doesn’t want it?”
“David is an accountant, and this badge is for a fireman. You’re my son, so you’re his grandson, too.”
“Thank you.” My argument about being a man today would be shot to shit if I started to cry. I blinked a couple of times, fooling myself that Dad didn’t notice.
“And this belongs to you, too.” He handed me a plain white envelope.
“What is it?” My brows pinched as I took it.
“It’s from your father to you. I don’t know what it says. Last time I checked, mail fraud was still a federal offense.” Dad winked. “We still have about fifteen minutes before we have to leave for the city. I’ll leave you alone. I thought you'd want your father to be a part of today.”
He turned to leave when I grabbed his arm.
“He is.” I pulled him into a hug. Jack was my father, but Nick was the man who raised me. The look of pride on his face when I told him I wanted to follow him into the fire department meant the world to me. “I love you, Dad.”
“I love you, too.” He pulled back. “Now we’re both crying. We look too good to be this sappy today.” He slapped my arm before leaving my room.
I laughed as I ripped open the envelope.
Dear Jack,
I don’t know what today is. Maybe you’re graduating from somewhere, getting married, or maybe the Islanders won the Stanley Cup. I asked for you to be given this letter on a special day in your life as a man.
I hate that I missed everything. But with this letter, maybe I kind of didn’t. I’m with you in some way, and that makes me happy.
I only knew you as an infant, almost toddler. Maybe it’s a father’s pride thing, but I knew you were destined for great things. There was a fire in your belly and a light in your eyes. Maybe you’d play for the Yankees or get a masters at some Ivy League school that would have laughed at me when I tried to apply. Whatever you are today, I know it’s something great. And wherever I am, I’m proud of you.
So now that you’re an adult, your old man needs a couple of favors.
Take care of your mom. Yeah, she’ll say she doesn’t need anything, blah blah. But you, I’m sure, know how stubborn she is (I gave her husband this same advice in his own letter. Dying has made me a wordy bastard). Come over, call even when you don’t have to. I’m sure Ellie raised a good man and not a jerk, so this all should be a given to you. She’s a special lady who gave the both of us all she had, and she deserves nothing less in return. Also, keep this letter between us. Let this be one private thing that we can share.
And if it’s not too much trouble, watch your Aunt Paige. I’m sure you heard the stories of how we grew up like twins. If you only knew the trouble she got herself into. But she’s sick now, and no one seems to know why. I hope she got better quickly, but something tells me this is a permanent thing. Same deal as your mom; make sure you visit her often and call. Your Uncle Evan has her more than covered, but extra eyes on her would make me feel better.
