“Youturn me on. But seeing you like this.” He rubbed my stomach before planting a soft kiss right below my belly button. “Knowing that’s my baby. As caveman as it sounds, it’s a part of you that will always belong only to me. Doesn’t make a lot of sense, I know.” Nick climbed next to me and propped his head up on his elbow. “And I’m perfectly fine with staying in. I’ll order pizza, and we can stay nakedallnight.” He waggled his eyebrows. “Or whatever you want. Menus are in the same place in the kitchen?”
“Sure,” I muttered with a groggy, sated voice. “We’ll need to keep up our strength. Maybe you should move in, and we could be naked all the time. Well, when Jack has sleepovers we can.” I kissed his lips and giggled.
“One thing at a time, sweetheart.” His smile wasn’t as bright as he kissed my forehead. “Be right back with the menus.” He pulled on his boxers before strolling out of the bedroom.
Why did it feel as if Nick blew me off after the hottest sex we ever had? Saying the baby was a part of me that will always belong to him most likely meant he still thought the rest of me didn’t. But I did belong to him—all of me. I didn’t care where we lived as long as we were together. I rubbed my belly as I settled onto my side.
I needed to figure out how to make him believe me.
Three months later
“THANKS FOR HELPINGout today, dude.” Evan handed me a beer bottle.
“No problem. Always drink at the office?” A smirk tilted my mouth as I grabbed the bottle and clanked the neck of Evan’s beer.
“My office, my rules.” Evan raised his bottle and headed over to his desk. “Plus, there’s no one here anyway.” He plopped down on the chair before taking a long swig. “That house is sick. Every time they ask us to come back, something else has me in awe.”
I nodded. “I know what you mean. That yard is so huge; you forget you’re in New York City for a minute.
Yes, we were talking aboutthathouse. It was still for sale, but I wouldn’t dare bring it up again. The mere idea of it was enough to break us up. Did I still want it for us? Yes. Our kids would have everything—their own rooms, a huge backyard, a basement big enough to have parties in. They’d love it.
Our kids. Maybe only one was biologically mine, but I wanted things for Jack, too. I thought of them both as belonging to me, along with their mother, even if they didn’t.
I leaned back in the leather desk chair next to Evan’s and let out a long sigh. If I wanted all those things with Ellie someday, I couldn’t rock the boat and push her.
“Be careful in that chair. If you lean back too much, it flips over. I should probably order a new one eventually.” Evan let out a sad laugh as he chugged the rest of the bottle.
“Why don’t you? Aren’t you ordering stuff for the new Yonkers office anyway?”
Evan met my gaze with a sad smile.
“That’s Jack’s old chair. I can’t bring myself to get rid of it. Even if I replace it, I doubt I’ll ever throw it out.”
I was sitting in Jack’s old broken seat.How appropriate.
“So, I hope you don’t mind me asking. And feel free to tell me to mind my own fucking business, but what’s going on with you and Ellie? You putting a ring on it or what?” Evan’s mouth curved up in a smile.
“You think I don’t want to? I made the mistake of talking about a house with her once and freaked her out. I’m not pushing again so she can run from me.”
I shook my head as I downed the last of my beer.
“I saw Ellie the other day. The best she can do is waddle now.” Evan snickered as he took the empty bottle from my hand. “Do you love her?”
I exhaled a long breath and dropped my head back. “I am hopelessly, stupidly in love with her. I would marry her tomorrow if I could—if she’d let me.” I shrugged before I rose from the chair. “This may be all she has to give me, and I need her too much to take the chance of scaring her off.”
“You need to tell her, man.” Evan arched an eyebrow. “What’s really stopping you?”
“I love her too much to lose her.” I rubbed my neck as I paced away from Evan. I stared at the old chair Jack left behind. I could never really take his place. It was something I had to come to terms with.
Evan rose from his seat and reached for the desk drawer in front of me. His office manager sat here during the day, but I knew if the chair belonged to Jack, so did the desk.
“I think . . . I think it’s time.” Evan handed me two plain white envelopes held together with a paper clip.
My brows pinched. “What’s this?”
“The top one is yours. That’s the final request I had to honor from my best friend. When you read it, you’ll get it.”
I nodded and slipped the letters into my pocket.
