“I…I don’t know. I like him a lot, of course. But it’s…complicated.”
“I feel like you two getting together would be the least complicated relationship that Holly Ridge has ever seen. You’re already a King by extension.”
“That’s the problem,” I say with a shake of my head and a sigh. My brother looks at me with a raised eyebrow but says nothing else. “Wren is my best friend, more a sister than a friend. Her parents are more like parents to me than our own. I work for them and work right with Madden. Fuck, I live on their property.”
“Okay…” he says as if he doesn’t understand, but I can tell from his face he does. He’s just waiting for me to say it out loud, as is his way. A bartender through and through, the man is half therapist, always waiting for you to process all of your thoughts before he adds any of his own. “So, are you afraid that Wren and the rest of them are going to be mad?”
“No,” I say with a choked laugh and shake of my head. “Are you kidding me? Wren would dance with joy. When we were kids, we made plans for me to marry one of them so I could be her real sister.”
“Good choice with Jesse. You’d eat Madden alive,” he says with a laugh, and I return it, then nod in agreement, and wonder how on earth Jesse never saw that.
“Exactly,” I take in a deep breath. “But if I tell her there’s something with Jesse and me, and we start dating, she’ll bethrilled. She’ll more than likely start planning our wedding, and Mrs. King will be right with her, happy at least one of her boys is settling down.” Colt nods, knowing this to be true. He was in the same grade as Madden, and he’s always been friends with both of the boys and thus knows all about Mrs. King’s woes. “But what happens when it ends? What happens when we break up or decide it just doesn’t work the way we thought, and it ends?”
He tips his head, assessing.
“Interesting that you saidwhenand notif,”he says after a moment, and I roll my eyes.
“You know what I meant.”
“Do I?” I glare at him, giving him a taste of his own medicine before he adds, “I just think it’s interesting that your instinct isn’t to think that things will work out and everyone will be happily ever after, you know?”
“It’s not like I had the best example of a happy, loving relationship,” I say under my breath, my finger playing with the condensation on the side of the glass.
“Mr. and Mrs. King?” he asks, with a pointed look.
“They’re a freak relationship, meant to happen.“
He shrugs. “Adam and Wren are pretty perfect.”
“They started dating three months ago. And, besides, Wren is a fairy princess who gives everything to everyone. She deserves the most amazing happiness.”
“And you don’t?” The question comes so quickly, like he’d been waiting to ask it, and it makes my defenses go even higher.
“What is this, therapy?” He looks at me, unyielding, and I try to explain, to get him to understand where I’m coming from. “I have to be rational, Colton. It might not end, but what happens if it does? What happens if it ends and ruins everything? I’d lose them all.” His face goes soft, and he leans in, reaching across the table to grab my hand and squeeze it.
“I think you have to decide if you want to live your life or keep yourself safe, Hallie. It’s clear you’ve been doing the latter for most of your adult life, but have you been happy?” I think about the vision boards in my room, all of them ambitious and exciting, yet incomplete. While some of those items aren’t crossed off because they were entirely unattainable, others are simply because I was too scared to try.
“The truth is, you’ll never know if something is going to last forever. If you look for the potential bad, you’ll always find it. Sometimes you just gotta jump and believe in thepromiseof forever.” My heart races with his words. “The promise, the hope of it—isn’t that what love is all about? Whatis lifeall about? Knowing you won’t be promised forever, knowing it could destroy you, and trusting in reaching for it anyway?”
Suddenly, it’s like a new door has opened, a new choice that I didn’t realize was there. It’s not just saying yes and worrying for the rest of my life or saying no and regretting it. There’s saying yes and trusting in my choice. Saying yes, and trusting that when I slip, Jesse will catch me before I fall.
And when I ask myself that—when I ask myself if I can trust that Jesse will catch me—the answer is clear.
It always has been.
I’m mulling over his words and my new realization, about to speak when a familiar voice calls. I turn and see everyone coming out our way—all three Kings, plus Nat and Adam—walking our way, and I smile.
Break TK
My brother, just as bad as Wren, plays matchmaker that night when he manipulates the table seating so I sit next to Jesse, not that I’m complaining.
The only thing Iamcomplaining about is the constant teasing.
Jesse’s arm lies casually along the back of my chair, which is normal for him, but occasionally, there are the most gentle touches of his skin on mine.
My bare shoulder in my off-the-shoulder sweater dress.
The back of my neck.
