“Was that your first kiss? On the park swings?”
Isabella nodded, getting a bit lost in the memory.
“Yes. Once we started kissing, we couldn’t seem to stop. I am sure Papa would have had a much tighter rein on me if it wasn’t Marco. But the whole neighborhood loved him.”
I sighed.
“Wait, does he go to school with us?”
Her eyes closed.
“Yes. He’s a senior. So is Gina. That’s why I take the bus now. He used to drive me. I never bothered to get a license because I never thought… Well, like I said, our lives… they were entwined.”
Isabella must have gotten chills because she buttoned my jacket up to warm herself. I slipped my arms around her and she rested her head against me.
With a sigh, she whispered, “Everyone keeps telling me to get over it. To move on. I know they are right, you know. He doesn’t deserve to be in my heart anymore, but all I keep doing is replaying our last week together in my head, trying to figure out what I did wrong. How did we go from being so in love we didn’t want to spend a minute apart to him making out with my best friend?”
I pressed a kiss into her hair and tried to offer her some kind of advice. Not that I was an expert on love, but I think I was starting to learn more about Isabella. Isabella fought anger with love. She fought evil with goodness. It was the best thing about her. But it was also the thing holding her back. She didn’t know how to fight love because love was supposed to heal her, not leave her broken. She was trying to fix it. Maybe not with Marco. But the idea of love being something painful instead of good.
“Isabella, I’m going to try to help you but keep in mind that I, myself, have a very warped view of the world, and it may come out completely wrong. Just keep in mind I have good intentions.”
She laughed so I took it as a sign to continue.
“You know how I always say that in my world, things have a cost? It’s not always money, obviously. Trying to find out a reason why Marco cheated on you, it won’t make anything better and it already cost him you, which I promise you, he regrets. I mean, anyone that has ever met you will attest that their life is better with you in it than without you.”
Isabella nuzzled closer to me and I squeezed her softly.
“The cost you paid for loving him was heartbreak. To me, loving someone is probably worth the risk of being heartbroken. It may not feel like it now, but you have good memories of your life with him. I know your pain can’t just disappear, and no one can put a timeline on when you are ready to move on, but love is worthjusta heartbreak. It’s not worth keeping it broken forever. My guess is what you really need is to stop wondering why it got broken and just start wondering how to go about healing it.”
She remained silent for a long time, but then she whispered, “Is that what you’re doing? Your whole mission to become someone better than you used to be—is that because it’s helping your heart heal?”
It was wrong of me, but I still wasn’t ready to tell her the truth. But I also refused to lie to her. I looked around the atrium for a moment and rested my head against hers.
“Yes. Most of the things I have done this past year have been about trying to heal, but honestly, you have been a godsend keeping me focused. The best thing that has ever happened to me was Mrs. Rogers making you my partner for this assignment.”
Isabella lifted her head to look at me; her huge brown eyes were filled with every emotion imaginable. She placed her hand on my cheek and whispered, “Maybe God sent you to me, too. I think… you are right. I have been focusing too much on why my heart was broken instead of how to make it heal. Will you help me?”
I placed my hand over hers.
“Always, Bella.”
This is where we would normally kiss. I could see in her eyes she wanted me to kiss her. Instead, I pressed my forehead to hers and whispered, “I think, though, it’s time to start trying something new.”
“Oh?”
Then, I uttered words I never thought I would say to her.
“No more kissing, Isabella.”
“But….”
“I don’t care about Cassidy, and I don’t care about Marco. We can still annoy them plenty, if you want, even without kissing. But our focus right now is healing your heart so that maybe, the next time we do kiss, our hearts will be open to the idea of igniting something more between us.”
A smile came to her lips.
“There will eventually be another kiss, though, right? This is not you saying you’re giving up on the possibility of finding our spark?”
I brushed a lock of hair behind her ear and smiled.
