“Bowl in the sink.” I pointed at her. “Brush your teeth, put on your pajamas.”
With a triumphant yelp, Evanne rushed off to her room at full speed.
“I suppose I can no longer pretend her hallway running wasn’t my fault,” I said with a sheepish smile. “Are you certain you don’t mind reading to her?”
Lumen shook her head, giving me a shy smile. “It’s fine, really. She’s a sweetheart, and I always enjoy reading time in class.”
We must have realized at the same time that we were alone because silence stretched between us as we finished our glasses of wine. Evanne had been our buffer. Without her, we avoided eye contact as long as we could, smiling and exhaling silent laughs through our noses whenever our eyes did meet, only to look away again.
I could see the struggle in her eyes and knew her thoughts were along the same lines as mine. What would a regular parent say to a regular teacher over a casual dinner? What would I talk with her about if we were both men? Or if I had a wife? If she had a husband? A boyfriend? If our first meeting had been at the school and we hadn’t had this strange, sensual history between us?
Nothing seemed appropriate. It was all too personal or not personal enough. The tension was palpable.
Too much later, Evanne padded back into the dining room, dressed in her favorite elephant pajamas. “I’m ready, Ms. Browne!” she announced.
“Brushed your teeth?” I asked.
“Yep!”
“She’s all yours then.” I stood. “I’ll clean up down here. Yell if you need me.”
Lumen followed Evanne while I gathered up the wine glasses and empty ice cream bowls. As they climbed the stairs, I heard Evanne say, “I want you to read me anewbook. Daddy always reads me the same three.”
I winced with guilt. I’d always made a point of finding her favorite books so she’d have copies here, then memorized them so that we could enjoy them over and over again. When she was younger, she’d loved the repetition. I hadn’t realized that had changed.
Trying to shrug off the negativity, I rinsed off all the dishes and put them in the dishwasher, then wiped down the kitchen counters with brisk precision. I hated leaving a mess if it could be helped. When I finished, I found that I didn’t quite know what to do next. If I went to the living room, I didn’t want Lumen to feel obligated to follow. But if I sat back at the dining room table, she might feel like I’d ambushed her with some sort of parent-teacher meeting.
That was how I ended up leaning against the counter, phone in hand as I checked my email and phone messages, taking the time to respond to a couple. Before I knew it, Lumen was back, her hands clasped in front of her as she walked into the kitchen.
“Out like a light,” she said. “I wish I could get to sleep that quickly. MaybeFantastic Mr. Foxisn’t as exciting as I thought it was.”
I chuckled. “Thanks for getting her situated.”
She smiled, that shy curving of her lips that held a wee bit of impishness that I had yet to see fully.
“It’s the least I could do after that wonderful meal. And wine. And ice cream.”
I grinned back. “I like to treat my guests well.”
“It seems so.”
Every second seemed to spread out as far as it could go, like a bowstring ready to snap. The air thickened, made it harder to breathe. My pulse thudded unsteadily, and I wondered if she was as affected as I was. My gaze dropped to her mouth, and I remembered what it had been like to kiss her.
She was the stronger one, the one able to finally speak, “I’d better get going.”
Even though I nodded, as if agreeing, I kept looking at her mouth. I wasn’t ready for her to leave. I knew that the night had to end, that we had to go back to our respective lives, but I wasn’t ready yet. I hadn’t thought we’d have a second chance, and now that Evanne had gone to bed, that chance was here.
Suddenly, she sighed. “Dammit.”
Her eyes blazed as she took two steps…toward me.
My arms reached for her automatically and bringing my mouth to hers felt like the most natural thing in the world. We’d have a price to pay, of that I was certain, but in this moment, all I knew was her.
Twenty-Two
Lumen
This was a bad idea.A very bad idea.
