I was taken aback by the abruptness in his voice. He had never lost it with me before. I was starting to understand now why he blamed himself for Elliott’s death. However, he shouldn’t have. He had to give that order; we all knew that, including Hunter.
I could tell there was more to it, though. Some reason why he couldn’t be there for me. When he had come back from his first tour with Elliott, he was far less caring than he had been before he left.
He was always a huggy, comforting kind of guy, but that stopped when he returned. At first, I thought it was just because of what he may have seen, but more and more, he started to pull away from me.
I softened my voice as I continued, the anger now turning into hurt and pain. “Hunter, it doesn’t matter that you gave the order. You had to do it to protect the whole squadron. Your intel was wrong. That was what got Elliott killed, not you. Plus, I can tell that isn’t the only reason. Please open up to me and tell me the truth.”
Even my calming voice did nothing for him as he quickly got up from his chair. “You want to know the real reason?”
I got up from my chair and stood there, staring into his eyes. “Yes, Hunter. I do!”
“Because I promised Elliott I would never touch you!”
CHAPTER 6
Hunter
I’d finally toldher the truth.
As we both stood there in silence staring at each other, I could see the shock on her face. I could also see the confusion as she went through everything in her head. I knew this wouldn’t be the end of the argument. She wouldn’t believe a word of it.
I was surprised it had taken this long for everything to come out. Every day since the funeral, I had been expecting to see Ember, and for her to have this conversation with me. However, she never came.
I guessed I understood why now. It probably hurt her as much as me to face the fact that Elliott was gone.
“It’s true, Emmy. Elliott made me promise that I would never touch you in any way more than just a friend or a brother. He told me I could never have the woman I loved. And I agreed to it.”
I could see her confusion starting to morph back into anger as she walked over and slapped me across the face. Even though it hurt, I just stood there.
We both needed this. Neither of us had grieved our loss – not just Elliott, but our own friendship and love.
“How dare you speak badly of Elliott?! He would never have made you make that promise. He knew how much I loved you. How much I still?—”
That was the moment we both realised the truth. I saw it in her eyes as soon as she said the words. The look told me that not only had she loved me, but that she still did, and not as a friend.
To hell with the promise. I needed to touch her.
I placed my hand on her face, and she instantly leaned into it. I wiped away her tears as I spoke.
“Let’s go sit down. We really should have talked about this a long time ago, and I think now is the right time.”
A sad smile came over her face, and she nodded. I took her hand in mine and led her into the living room. She took a seat on the settee, and I went over to stoke up the fire and place another log on it. I loved the warmth of the fire and wanted to make it as welcoming as possible to have this difficult conversation.
As I sat down next to her, I wanted to take her hand in mine, but I knew I had to tell her everything first. Then she could make her own decision.
“So, it was just before we went on our first tour. We were packing all our stuff, getting ready to leave, and he asked me how I felt about you. I told him the truth: that I loved you. I think at first he thought I meant in the same way he loved you, but then he looked into my eyes and realised that I meant I loved you as the gorgeous woman you are.
“We had a huge argument over it. He said that I wasn’t the right guy for you, and I would hold you back from doing all the things you had planned for your life. That I would expect you to be the little ‘wifey’ at home, looking after the house and kids, while I was out living it up.
“I tried to argue with him, tell him that I would never stand in the way of your career. I was so proud of what you had already achieved, and I would never have taken your dreams away from you. He asked me to prove it and said if I really loved you that much, I would let you live your own life and not get involved with you.
“What could I do? If I ignored him and continued as normal, he would have assumed that I didn’t love you as much as I said. If I made the promise and kept to it, I proved my love for you, but also pushed you away from me. Either way, I would probably have lost you. I hoped that once I proved myself, he would finally give in, but then everything happened and I didn’t know what to do.
“I was at the funeral, for a while. I had gone and made my peace at the chapel of rest, first thing in the morning. Then I stood in the back of the crowd at the burial. I so wanted to run up to you and wrap my arms around you, but the promise I’d made just kept going around my head. I realise now that was when I lost you and it was too late for us. Especially when I found out you were dating and then got engaged to Wayne.”
I could see the pain in her face when I mentioned his name. I wasn’t sure if I should mention that I knew what had happened, but I didn’t have to, as she spoke.
“It’s over between us. That was the reason I was out in this stupid weather. I found him in bed with his secretary this evening. I was so hurt and angry that when I arrived here and found out it was your house, I wanted to lash out at you. I wanted to hurt you like I was hurting, like Iamhurting now. I’m so sorry.”
