What would happen if I did go? That question brought its own cascade of terrifying possibilities, none of which I was prepared to face.
A soft knock at my door startled me from my spiraling thoughts. "Leo-kun?" Aunt Akiko called softly. "May I come in?"
"Yes," I answered, quickly composing myself on the edge of my bed, as if I hadn't spent the afternoon in existential crisis.
She entered with a small tray—tea, from the smell of it, and some of the almond cookies she made when she thought I needed cheering up.
"I'm sorry about lunch," she said, setting the tray on my nightstand. "I didn't mean to upset you by mentioning your birth. That was thoughtless of me."
Guilt twisted in my gut. Here she was, apologizing to me, when I was the one hiding a mountain of secrets from her. "It's fine, Aunt Akiko. I just… it's been a strange couple of days."
"Having visitors is always an adjustment when you're used to quiet," she said, misunderstanding completely. "But I think it's good for you to have company. Those young men seem very interested in your well-being."
If she only knew exactly what kind of "interest" they had in my well-being.
"They left a few hours ago," she continued, pouring tea into a delicate cup. "Said they were going hunting in the forest."
A chill ran down my spine at her casual words. Hunting. Of course. "Hunting what?" I asked, trying to keep my voice neutral.
"They didn't say," she replied with a small shrug. "But those alphas just love to hunt, don't they? It's in their nature. Jiro-san says that's why they're such good protectors—they understand predators because they are predators themselves."
Uncle Jiro was more perceptive than I'd given him credit for.
"They won't be joining us for dinner," Aunt Akiko added, a note of disappointment in her voice. "Which is a shame. It's been so nice having people over. We don't get much entertainment out here, so it's been a lovely change having them around."
The genuine pleasure in her voice made my chest ache. For all that this isolated cottage was my prison, it was also their exile—two elderly people assigned to guard a yakuza disappointment, cut off from normal social interactions because of me.
"I'm sorry you're stuck out here," I said quietly, the words escaping before I could stop them. "Because of me."
Aunt Akiko's eyes widened. "Leo-kun! Don't ever think such a thing. Jiro and I are exactly where we want to be. Your father didn't assign us to you—we requested this position when we learned he was looking for caretakers." She reached out tosqueeze my hand. "We love you, silly boy. As if you were our own."
The simple declaration made my throat tight with unexpected emotion. Whatever happened tonight, whatever choice I made, I couldn't let it affect them. They deserved to be protected from the darkness surrounding me.
"I love you too," I managed, squeezing her hand in return. "You and Uncle Jiro both."
She beamed, patting my cheek affectionately. "Drink your tea, eat your cookies, and rest. I'll call you when dinner is ready."
After she left, I sat motionless on the edge of my bed, staring at the clock as it ticked ever closer to ten. The alphas were hunting, Aunt Akiko had said. Hunting me, I understood perfectly. Tonight, I would either go to them willingly or they would come for me—and they'd made it abundantly clear which option would be better for everyone involved.
The decision crystallized in that moment, hardening from nebulous dread into cold certainty. I would go to their camp at ten. Not because I wanted to, not because I'd been successfully blackmailed, but because it was the only way to protect the people I loved from the consequences of my choices.
Sometimes surrendering one battle was the only way to survive the war. Tonight, I would surrender. Tomorrow… well, tomorrow I'd see what was left of me to salvage.
thirteen
. . .
The clock mocked me with every tick, each minute dragging us closer to the inevitable. Ten after ten. Seventeen past. Thirty-four minutes after ten. By now, they'd be waiting, those three alphas in their luxury camp, expecting me to arrive exactly when commanded like some well-trained pet responding to a whistle.
Fuck that.
If I had to surrender to blackmail, I'd do it on my terms. Small rebellions were all I had left, and being late—deliberately, calculatedly late—felt like the only control I still possessed in this entire fucked-up situation.
I'd showered for the second time today, scrubbing my skin until it turned pink, as if hot water could somehow wash away the inevitability of what was coming. Now I stood in front of my bathroom mirror, examining the mark Matteo had left on my neck the night before. The bruise had darkened to a perfect imprint of his teeth, a possessive brand that made my pulse quicken every time I touched it.
"Well, this is just perfect," I told my reflection. "Countdown to complete degradation: T-minus however many minutes untilI decide to stop stalling and face the three horsemen of the omega apocalypse."
My clothing choice seemed simultaneously important and utterly pointless. What did it matter what I wore when the entire purpose of tonight was for them to remove it? Still, I pulled on the tiniest sleep shorts I owned and an oversized t-shirt that slipped off one shoulder. If I was walking into my own surrender, I might as well dress like the victim I was about to become.
