Prologue - Jax
One Month Prior to Anton’s Death
Jax jumped when he heard Anton coming. He could tell it was him from the sound of his boots on the cold, hard cement. The door opened, and Anton entered the room. Jax turned to look at him; his heart rate picked up again because he knew that anytime he saw the alpha, it meant bad news.
“You look troubled,” Anton said. He laughed loudly, and Jax just stared at him as he cowered in the corner, trying to make himself as small a target as possible. All the while knowing it wouldn’t help. Because he knew what came next.
Jax wanted to beg when Anton pulled out a shot, but it would do him no good; he’d learned that the hard way. He didn’t take his eyes of the alpha as he flicked it with his finger and the liquid shook in the needle. Then Anton turned to Jax. “You’ll thank me in the end, or maybe not.” His words were followed by a cruel laugh before he moved closer, grabbed Jax’s arms, and plunged the needle in. Jax closed his eyes tightly and waited for the burning sensation to hit his body. He wouldn’t cry. It only made Anton angrier or worse—turned on.
Although the shot meant he wouldn’t be the one touching Jax today.
The shots were meant to block their heat—or so they were told. Jax didn’t know if it was true. Anton was a liar. But fighting getting them wouldn’t do any good.
One thing he did know—the abuse that he received at the alpha’s hand had increased over the weeks. He would find himself cringing whenever he had to be with “his” alpha as the man insisted Jax call him. And it had been the same one for the last few weeks. For some reason, he’d taken an interest in Jax. No matter how much he wished it wasn’t the case.
The worst part was he felt awful wishing it because that would mean one of his friends would be in this position.
Jax closed his eyes and tried to force his mind to drift off to his safe place now.
“There you go. That’s a good omega,” Anton spoke in a condescending tone, which made Jax squeeze his eyes tighter, trying to block the man out. But then Anton grabbed Jax’s arm and pulled him away from the comfort of his corner.
Jax knew it wouldn’t make a difference, still he tried. “Please,” he whispered.
Anton jerked his arm. “Stop your bitchin’. You know the drill already. Behave and it’ll be over quick as can be.”
Jax did know the drill, but he was tired of being the alpha’s punching bag, among other things. Anton pulled Jax into a familiar dark room. He then left him there, as Jax trembled and had to wait for the alpha to come into the room. As Jax stood there, even though he knew it was no use, he felt compelled to at least try to escape. He turned and hurried towards the door but then heard the sound of the other door open.
“Stop right there!”
Jax turned around, and the alpha came into the light. He moved closer to him, and Jax saw he held a whip. “You can’t run from me. You’re useless, but you will still give me what I want.” He struck the whip across Jax’s arm, and Jax flinched and bit the inside of his mouth till he tasted blood. He didn’t know what the other man meant by “you will give me what I want.” It was a cryptic message that only the alpha, and maybe Anton, understood.
For several more minutes, the alpha used the whip on Jax. He closed his eyes and just took it. His back felt like it was on fire, the pain like a living thing. There was no way for him to get out of the situation, so he let himself drift off. Imagined what it would be like if his very own alpha found him and saved him. Dreamed of his mate holding him. Telling him he was perfect.
“Why are you so useless?” the alpha screamed as he hit him repeatedly. Jax could already feel the welts forming as the whip landed on his back.
What the alpha wanted was a mystery to Jax, but he dared not ask. He closed his eyes and focused on that someday place, holding on to it tightly as the alpha ripped off his clothes. Even with what followed, Jax refused to give up on his dreams. His alpha would come for him. If he stopped believing that, there was no point living. And he wouldn’t give Anton that satisfaction. His alpha was waiting for him. He would be sweet and kind. He would be loving and never ever take anything from Jax.
Jax let himself float off into that place where that was his life. Not just a dream that was getting harder and harder to hold on to.
Chapter One
Jax
Jax entered the dark room. He heard the door slam behind him, and he jumped, turning around to see what it was that had made the door bang shut. “Hello?” he called out.
“You’re useless!” a voice called out to him.
Jax whimpered and cowered in the corner. The voice only got louder. “Go away!” He covered his ears, his body trembling as the voice continued shouting at him. “No! No! I don’t believe you!” he continued to cry out.
“Useless omega, you’re going to pay for not giving me what I want.” The alpha grabbed his whip and began to hit him, not caring where the lashes landed. Jax cried out in pain, his whole body on fire. The whip tore at his skin. “You’re useless!” the alpha screamed again, spittle landing on him.
The sound of a baby crying cut through the night air. “Don’t cry! Daddy’s coming!” Jax whimpered. “Don’t cry, sweetheart! I’m coming!”
“Tabby!” Jax woke up with a start and sat up in bed. His heart was racing as he peered into the darkness of the room. Thank the Goddess, it had only been a nightmare. They weren’t anything new at this point. He’d been having them regularly and really should be used to them. But Goddess, he hated it. It was a never-ending cycle. The sound of Tabitha crying still echoed through the monitor.
Yeah, now is so not the time to think about how screwed up you are.Jax tossed the covers back and got out of bed. He yawned as he glanced at the clock and saw it was just after two in the morning.
He left his room and walked to the bedroom that had been set up with a crib for his daughter. Well, it had started with a crib, but slowly and surely, it was turning into a full-blown nursery. No matter how much he tried to tell Ryder it wasn’t necessary.
