My baby ran up for another hug which I quickly reciprocated then I slid my arms into the coat that Kiyan was now holding open for me before we headed out.
“You good?” Kiyan leaned in to ask once we were rolling.
“I’m fine. Thank you,” I smiled. “Are you?”
He nodded. “I know I didn’t exactly say it earlier, but you really look amazing, Leila. You’re beautiful every time I see you, but tonight you’re just… it’s so hard for me to put into words.”
“It’s fine.” I pushed some of my hair behind my ear. “The way that you look at me says it all.”
Our hands were entangled so he gave mine a gentle squeeze before turning to look out of the window. We pulled up to the university thirty minutes later and after making it inside the grand hall, I was in awe of the décor. There were three massive Christmas trees covered in ivory and golden ornaments as well as accent pieces across the room that immediately caught my attention. It was in front of a large, bay window that gave the perfect view of the snow blanketed university grounds.
There was a large, open space that was clearly the dance floor with the deejay booth tucked in the corner of it. Garland was intertwined with gold lights circling the banisters and posts all around the room. All of the tables were covered in either ivory or gold satin tablecloths perfectly decorated with plates, glasses, and dinnerware to match the Christmas theme for the night.
Along the walls, subtle nods of academia were woven into the décor. There were leather bound book stacks beside arrangements of holly, calligraphy styled signage with timeless literary lines, and a massive fireplace with stockings embroidered with the university logo or seal on them. It was all beautiful.
Kiyan took my coat and said he was going to put it away then welcome all of the guests right before Melonie whisked me away to meet some of their colleagues that were already inside,then we went to the open bar where her cousin and sister were already waiting with glasses of champagne for us.
“Ugh, I needed tonight,” Kayla voiced. “Irving and I have been so busy with work and the boys that I don’t know if I’m coming or going most days. A night to drink and just relax is just what the doctor ordered.”
I nodded. “I will admit that it’s been nice to do something other than be a wife and mom. I know that sounds horrible,” I looked between them all, “but it’s the truth. Parenting a special needs child can be taxing on my mental as well, so you guys inviting me out has been a great reset.”
“Oh, I could only imagine girl,” Miranda replied, delivering a sympathetic look. “And it doesn’t sound horrible. Not to us anyways.” She nodded toward Melonie and Kayla. “Sure, you married and had a child… both of those things require a lot of time and attention, but you have to take care of you too,” she nodded. “My mom was notorious for taking the weekends offfrom everythingand doing what she wanted to do. I didn’t understand it when I was a little girl, but now as an adult, who works and takes care of my family, I fully understand why it’s important to take care of myself first.”
“Right,” Miranda agreed. “You have to take care ofyouin order to take care of everyone else.”
“And now that you have me as a friend slash cousin, you won’t have to worry about that ever again.” Melonie held onto my arm and smiled. “We’ll have girls’ day at least twice a week.”
“Oh God,” Kayla playfully groaned. “I’ll be sure to pray for you, Leila.”
We stayed over by the bar drinking until Melonie was summoned by one of the deans. Miranda and Kayla’s husbands both came to get them as well. They tried staying with me, but I assured them that I was fine and encouraged them to go and enjoy their kid free time with their men. I went and found a seatat one of the empty tables, looking around, taking everything in until my gaze locked with Kiyan’s.
He was clearly having a conversation, but his eyes were on me the entire time without shame. I had to be the topic of the conversation because the other two men looked my way as well, waving when they saw that I was looking, so I smiled politely and waved back.
Kiyan excused himself shortly after that and made his way in my direction. Like it always did when he was around, my chest tightened. I was used to being in his presence now, and I loved it, but my palms still got sweaty, and I still got butterflies when he was close.
“Hey.” I took the hand that he’d extended when he was close enough and allowed him to help me up. “What are you doing?”
“Dance with me.”
“Ki—okay.” Even if I’d reminded him that I couldn’t dance, he’d only tell me to follow his lead, so I didn’t argue—I just smiled allowing him to escort me to the dance floor.
When we got to his desired spot, he pulled me close to his body. I immediately closed my eyes after laying my head on his chest, enjoying the scent of his cologne and the feeling of being in his arms. As we swayed to the beat of the song, I thought about how I felt, not just in that moment but in general. Things were nowhere near resolved and I wasn’t where I wanted to be yet, but I was at peace, and I was happy. My daughter was doing better; she wasn’t tucked underneath me twenty four seven, she was expressing herself more, learning more, just all around doing better.
And it was all thanks to the man that had me feeling like I was floating on a cloud somewhere.
“What’s got you thinking so hard?” His deep voice had his chest vibrating on my face.
Pulling my head up, I glanced up at him and smiled. “You actually.”
He chuckled softly. “Yeah? What about me?”
“How I wish that I could live in this moment with you forever,” I confessed. “Well, not specificallythismoment because these shoes aren’t it,” I chuckled lowly, “but in this space that I’m in… happy and at peacewith you.”
“Who says you can’t? I’m not going anywhere, Leila. Not tonight. Not tomorrow. Not when you get scared and start to overthink or when you try to push me away.” He brushed his thumb gently along my jawline. “You deserve to be where you are, love.”
My arms were already around his neck, so I tightened them some, bringing him down into a kiss. I know he expected it to just be something quick, but it wasn’t. It was deep and passion filled. It didn’t matter that we weren’t the only ones in the room because the timing felt right.
Everything felt right.
