“The Kallikantzaroi,” he said. “Little fuckers. They’re vessels of chaos. They like to destroy and steal things. They’re why I’m here. Apparently, you can ward them off by hanging a few pig jaws around the place.”
“Are you saying they took my staff?” she asked.
He shrugged. “Probably, and whatever else they found interesting.”
Circe’s lip curled and her eyes darkened. Truthfully, Hermes had always been afraid of Circe, but her expression frightened him. He felt the unmistakable pull of teleportation clawing at his body. It was always uncomfortable as a mortal, and suddenly he stood in the middle of the goddess’s living room.
It took a moment for the dizziness to pass and then he glanced around. She had a set of benches covered in plush fur on either side of a large piece of polished stone which acted as a table. Decorative mosaics made for stunning decor on the floors and walls, and plush animal skins made soft rugs.
It felt nostalgic and strangely sad.
As Hermes looked around, he noticed other things too. Grapes and olives were scattered across the floor, silver bowls upturned. Vases were tipped over or broken, pillows were ripped open, and feathers covered the room.
A statue had been knocked over; a spray of marble pieces scattered across the floor. He recognized the thin pieces as the rays of Helios’s radiant crown.
Circe went to the fallen statue and kneeled beside it.
Helios was dead, having been torn from the sky by Hecate during the Olympian War. Hermes was not sure Circe knew the details, but he was sure she knew he had died despite her exile on the island. She was his blood and had likely felt it.
As bad as he felt for her, he also realized she was distracted. He turned to make his escape, searching for an exit, only to find four giant cats standing guard. They bared their teeth, growling.
Hermes broke into a sweat and laughed nervously before turning to face Circe again.
The goddess rose, features like stone. “You say you know these creatures?” she asked.
“I wouldn’t say I know them.” He paused as her gaze narrowed, the growling behind him increased in volume. “But I…I know enough.”
“Then you will ward my home against them and find my staff.” Her voice was thunderous and dark, no longer warm and alluring.
“Fine,” he said, crossing his arms. “But what do I get in return?”
Circe’s chin dipped, arms at her sides as she took a few menacing steps toward him.
“You get to remain just as you are,” she said. “A privilege few are granted here.”
With that, she vanished, leaving him alone with her giant cats.
Hermes sighed, shoulders drooping. “Merry fucking Christmas to me,” he said.
Chapter 7
Hades
Hades was bent over a mostly assembled crib trying to fit the tiniest fucking screw into the tiniest fucking hole. He’d already dropped it three times, and his patience was wearing thin. Hermes had been helping, who despite arguing otherwise, had small, delicate hands, but the fucker had to go and get himself exiled. Hades had considered recalling him from Circe’s island to help but did not wish to incurred Hecate’s wrath. She was just about as testy as he was now that night had fallen and the Kallikantzaroi were roused.
“Yes!” Hades breathed as the screw sunk in place.
Now he just needed to secure it.
He straightened, looking for the screwdriver which he’d left near the instructions, but it wasn’t there. He checked his pockets, thinking he might have slipped it in one for easier access, but they were both empty.
“Motherfucker,” he muttered.
He checked every part of the room in case it had rolled into a darkened corner, but it wasn’t there.
His face grew flush, angry and impatient, and he did the only thing he could. He summoned a new, identical screwdriver with magic. As ridiculous as it was, he felt like he was cheating. He knew Persephone would not actually care how he finished assembling the crib, but he felt pressure to execute things as she wished, mostly because he saw how hard she worked without magic.
The guilt soon gave way to frustration when he returned to the crib and found the screw he’d so tediously slipped into place gone and nowhere in sight.
