“Great job!” Amelia said, taking a step back from me.
I grimaced as I pushed myself up to a half-seated position, propping myself up on my forearms. “You still managed to knock me to the mat,” I said.
“Sure, but it’s taking longer each time,” Amelia said, reaching her hand out to me and helping haul me to my feet.
I grimaced, rotating my arm, which felt like she had yanked it from its socket when she jerked me upright. “It doesn’t feel like I’m getting that much stronger,” I said.
“It’s a process,” Amelia shrugged. “You’ve been doing this for all of a few weeks. That isn’t a lot of time. But you’ve made a lot of great strides. When you started, you couldn’t even break a simple hold.”
Making another face, I stretched, first one way, then the other. “Sure, but it isn’t as though I’m going to be able to fight anyone.”
“The point isn’t to fight,” Amelia lectured. “But to defend yourself long enough to get away. You’re small. You just need to learn to use your opponent’s weight and size against them, and that takes time. But you’re already getting the feel for it.”
I didn’t answer right away, glancing around the sparring room, the mats soft beneath my bare feet. I knew all of this, but still, something made me feel as though I had to prove myself. Maybe it was the way Sam looked at me like I was fragile stained glass that would shatter with a single touch. I hadn’t missed the way he hovered over me whenever he got the chance, or how he constantly asked where I was going and if I would be alone. I had hoped that training with Amelia would soothe his fears asmuch as it built my confidence. Instead, it had only seemed to exacerbate them.
I understood he was concerned, especially with the lesser demons and the wraith, but it was impossible not to feel smothered.
“I’ve got to get ready for my next class,” Amelia said, glancing up at the clock. “But I’ll see you Thursday. Remember not to be so hard on yourself.”
I gave a half-smile. “No promises, but I’ll do my best.”
I walked home, letting my aching muscles stretch and loosen. The street was empty, and the first vestiges of twilight shone out over the sky. I let the cool air brush across my face, and I inhaled deeply, savoring being outdoors.
My hands suddenly grew hot.
I stiffened, fear gripping me as I stared down at them. The last time they had burned like this, flames had shot from my fingers and burned the chicken I had been cooking in a matter of seconds.
Panic raced through me. I wasn’t sure what was happening with me. It was as if there was a fire somewhere in my body that I hadn’t realized was there. Only, the last few weeks, it had grown more powerful, and I didn’t know what it was or how to control it. I felt like I was going insane, except there was no way I could be hallucinating, because I had seen it happen too many times before.
I ran home as fast as I could, ignoring my protesting muscles. I needed to get home before anything happened. My hands were a ticking bomb, and I had no idea how long the timer was set for.
I barely managed to make it home and slam the doors shut before the heat seemed to burst out of me as if someone had released a valve. This time, there were no bursts of flame, but I could feel that ripple of heat in the air. Slowly, I looked at my hands.
Fire wrapped around each of my fingers, casting flickering, dancing shadows. They didn’t burn, but I could feel their heat, and I could feel a sudden urge to wield it. More than that, I could sense some sort of instinct lurking beneath the surface, as if I had always known what to do and I had just been waiting for the right moment.
I watched, concentrating on the flames that looked like pointed caps covering each finger. I nearly jumped out of my skin when the flames lengthened, turning into spiraling tendrils that wrapped themselves into a bright orange and yellow orb swirling over my palm, illuminating the room as it waited for my command.
A lump formed in my throat.
When we had been attacked by the demons, and Emma had cast her magic, I had thought I imagined sparks of flame bursting from my fingers. I had told myself it was only in my imagination. After Sam and I had sex, it had only gotten worse.
I had been denying it ever since that hike, but I couldn’t do that any longer, not with the proof swirling in my hand right in front of me. I had seen Emma wield water often enough to know that it was magic.
I swallowed, staring at the flame as I forced myself to accept the truth: somehow, impossibly, I was a witch.
I made the globe grow and shrink in my hand. I released it, and it hovered in the air, bobbing slightly. I made it follow me, illuminating the otherwise dark house. The flame did whatever Iwanted, dancing and swirling, stretching into a line and twisting itself into a perfect pretzel shape. It seemed to respond to my every thought, listening to whatever came into my mind almost as fast as I could think it.
Eventually, though, I made it vanish, leaving me in a chilly darkness as the heat dissipated. I ran my fingers through my hair as I took a deep breath, trying to figure out what to do.
I couldn’t tell people the truth. Despite Emma being somewhat accepted by the pack, witches in general were still disliked and distrusted at best in the pack, despised and reviled at worst. Emma only got a pass because she was the luna and had proven herself during the wraith’s attack several months ago. I, on the other hand, didn’t have the luxury of being the luna or of having done anything remotely useful during the attack. Most of the pack still only tolerated me, calling me weak and useless when they didn’t think Elias could hear. If I came out and announced my powers, I’d most likely be cast out at best.
And then there was Sam. I had no idea what he would do. We had only recently started connecting again. I had found myself enjoying spending time with him. I liked his company. I didn’t know how I would react if he rejected me when he found out. Despite our past history, the thought of losing him because of magic terrified me. No, it was better to keep it a secret. I just needed to learn how to control it all.
The question was, how to do that without anyone discovering my secret, and how to do so without burning down the entire town.
***
Night had fallen. Jenson had left an hour ago, leaving Liv and me to close. As we did, I noticed Liv tapping her foot asshe glanced at her watch, gnawing the inside of her cheek as she looked outside.
