Zephyr, Raylan’s horse, let out a chuffing sound and flicked his tail in annoyance, like he was over listening to the two of us fight. Not a surprise, really, given that the black stallion had a temperament that matched his owner. Raylan kept the big, beautiful animal boarded at the ranch since he used him for most of the outdoor excursions he was in charge of running for the lodge. Usually, all animals loved me, so I blamed Zephyr’s disdain solely on the human equivalent of the poop emoji in the saddle on his back.
“I see you haven’t managed to grow up any since the last time I talked to you.”
Fuckingouch.
I froze on the spot. My lungs squeezed, and even my heart stalled for the span of a few beats as that blow found the mark necessary to inflict maximum damage. The age gap between Raylan and me hadalwaysbeen a sore spot, even more so since the night he shot me down and crushed my heart. It wasn’t the first time he’d said or done something that made me feel like a little kid. But itwasthe first time he’d ever made me feel like my age somehow made me unworthy.
I tried to mask the pain, but from the way his back went straight, I had a feeling I hadn’t done a good enough job.
Raylan let out a sigh. “Shit, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
“Get fu—” My words were cut off by the rustle of leaves at the tree line. A moment later, one of the lodge horses pushedthrough the brush with a kid who looked to be around twelve or thirteen in the saddle. I swallowed down the rest of my curse as the kid came to a stop beside Raylan.
Curious eyes bounced between the two of us before he asked, “Everything cool?”
Raylan reached over and roughed the boy’s hair playfully. “Yeah, kid. Why don’t you ride on ahead a bit. I’ll catch up. You good with that?”
“Yeah, Ray. I’m all good.” The kid looked back at me, shooting me a wonky smile that I couldn’t help but return. “Ma’am,” he greeted, puffing his chest out and peacocking for all he was worth.
I giggled just as Raylan pulled the ballcap from his head and used it to swat at the boy’s floppy hair. “Get movin’.”
With a chuckle, the boy started off, but not before twisting back and shooting me a wink. I didn’t have the first clue who he was, or what he was doing with the surly bastard who’d invaded my peaceful morning, but that kid was going to be a lady killer for sure.
“Look, Lenni,” Raylan started, but I was officially done with him.
“You know exactly where my property lines are.” He knew because he’d been a big part of helping me and my family renovate the cabin and build this place into what it was. “Next time you’re looking for a new place to take guests, make sure you steer very clear.”
With that, I snatched up my coffee cup and whistled for Ziggy to come back inside. Then I held my middle finger high in the air as I stomped back inside my house and slammed the door.
Chapter Three
Raylan
Fucking hell. I was such an asshole.
If it were physically possible, I would have kicked my own ass for being such a dick to Lennix. Especially for that comment about her being immature. I saw the moment that insult landed and took root. The hurt that flashed across her beautiful face and turned her dark green eyes sad for a split second before she hid it behind the armor of her fierce attitude and grabbed hold of her anger.
It was a shitty thing to say, and I knew I’d seriously fucked up as soon as the words left my mouth. They weren’t even true, for Christ’s sake. Most of the time it was easy to forget that Lennix was so much younger than I was.
Tooeasy.
That was the problem.
As the years progressed and Lennix got older, I’d started to see her in a totally different light. I wasn’t sure when it happened, but one day she’d stopped being my best friend’skid sister and I couldn’t help but notice the gorgeous, confident woman she’d turned into every time I looked at her.
She was strong and loyal and responsible. She might have had a childhood that was better than mine had been—at least until Marco came into our lives and shouldered some of the burden my oldest sister, Gypsy, had been forced to carry, trying to raise all of us after our worthless parents bailed. But she’d never once taken her upbringing for granted.
Lennix worked hard for everything she had, earning the right to run the bar that was as much her family’s legacy as the ranch we stood on through hard work, grit, and determination. She even managed to make the placemorepopular than it had already been by expanding it into a full-blown brewery. She’d proven herself to everyone around her, time and time again.
Truth was, I brought up the gap between us as often as I did becauseIwas the one who needed to remember. I was constantly having to remind myself it was wrong to feel the way I felt about Lennix Paulson. If Zach knew the thoughts that went through my head about his little sister, he would skin me alive and leave me out in the middle of nowhere for the animals to feed on. And I wouldn’t blame him one damn bit.
After all, I didn’t have the best reputation when it came to relationships. Lennix wasn’t the kind of woman you took to bed for a little fun with the understanding it wasn’t going to last past the sun coming up. She was the kind of woman you built a life with. A forever. And I had no interest in that kind of thing. I’d seen first-hand how a toxic relationship could destroy everything around it with my own parents. I had no desire to go down that road.
I had Peggy and Danny Bradbury’s blood running through my veins, and if I ever needed a reason why I wasn’t built for a committed relationship, that was it. My parents were worthless pieces of shit. Scum of the earth.
And the thought that I might be like either of them in any way had me keeping a safe distance from monogamy for as long as I could remember. Especially when it came to Lennix. If there was one woman on the face of this earth who I wanted to keep safe from my toxic Bradbury blood, it was her. She deserved so much more than I was capable of giving her. I wasn’t worthy of all that goodness and light.
“So...” Toby finally spoke as the barn came into view. I’d felt his inquisitive stare burrowing into the side of my face since I caught up with him and knew it was only a matter of time before my silence got to be too much. “You gonna tell me who that hottie was back there?”
