“Probably around the time Brooke was attacked. Things changed between us after that. I was consumed with her, and he was often critical of how I was handling things.”
“How were you supposed to handle such a thing?” Sam asked.
“Who knows? It’s not like there’s a handbook on what to do when your daughter is drugged and gang-raped at a party where other kids were murdered. I handled it the best way I knew how, by loving her through it. Apparently, I didn’t save enough love for him.”
Angela crossed her arms and looked down at the floor. “That doesn’t sound like him.”
“You don’t live with him. He’s quick with the critique and to tell me how he would’ve done something differently. When he started saying I was being overprotective of Ethan because of what’d happened to Brooke, and how it wasn’t fair to Ethan… After a while, I started doubting my own judgment. Like, maybe he was right, and I was wrong.”
“He wasn’t right,” Sam said. “You were.”
“And I knew that. I absolutely knew it, but he’d already given an inch, and that was just enough space in the parental unity for Ethan to walk right through the door into freedom.” Tracy wiped away a tear. “Mike never intended for something like this to happen. I know that, and I feel for him. I really do. But I’m so fucking angry.”
“You have every right to be, Trace,” Sam said.
“I must’ve pissed someone off in a past life to have this stuff happen to two of my kids.”
“You’re a great mom, and you’ve never done anything to anyone that would make it so you deserve this.” Sam glanced at Angela, who was still looking at the floor. “Right, Ang?”
“Definitely.”
“Are you okay?” Sam asked Angela.
She nodded and then just as quickly shook her head. “I feel so guilty.” She glanced at Tracy. “I let Mike stay at my house last night, and I’m scared you’re going to hate me for that.”
“How’d that happen?”
“When I couldn’t reach you, I called him to see how Ethan was doing. He told me you’d asked him to leave, and I said he should stay with us. I’m sorry if that adds to your anger, Trace, but I felt so bad for him.”
“It’s fine. I’d rather he stay with you than run up the credit card at a hotel.”
“Really? You’re not mad?”
“I’m sad and worried and anxious and devastated, but I’m not mad at you. I get that you guys love him like a brother, and I’ve always wanted that. I’d never ask you to turn your backs on him. But please… Don’t push me when it comes to him. If and when I talk to him, it’ll be when I’m ready and not one second before.”
Sam hugged her. “Whatever you need.” After she released her sister, she went to look in on the kids in the living room. Scotty, Jack and Alden were sitting with Ethan on the sofa while Abby braided Aubrey’s hair as Ella looked on. Sam signaled to her sisters. “Come see our babies.”
They peeked through the door together.
“It’s good for him to have the kids around,” Tracy said. “Especially Scotty. He looks up to him.”
“He has been so concerned about Ethan. He asked to see him today.”
“Tell me he’s going to be okay.”
“He will be,” Angela said.
“It might not happen overnight,” Sam said, “but he’ll get through this, and so will you.”
“I sure hope you’re right, because right now, it feels like I’m staring up yet another mountain that has to be climbed to get my child back on track.”
Sam put her arm around Tracy. “If anyone is capable of climbing that mountain, it’s you.”
* * *
At lunchtime on that Tuesday, Archie bought Chinese takeout for his team since they’d been working overtime on the missing children and Carver cases. After the food arrived, the group gathered in the conference room to eat like the ravenous wildebeests they were when free food was put in front of them.
Archie sat with them for a few minutes before taking his box of rice and chicken, along with a set of chopsticks, with him when he went down two flights of stairs to the city jail. He nodded to the sergeant on duty and made his way to the last cell on the right, where he took a seat on the floor across from the cell to eat his lunch.
