"I didn't have a staff growing up. My mother worked two jobs. If I wanted to eat something that didn't come out of a microwave, I had to learn how to make it."
It’s a small piece of myself I rarely share. The poverty. The hunger. The drive that started not with ambition, but with an empty stomach.
She watches me, chin resting on her hand. Her eyes are soft.
"What are we making?"
"Pasta," I say, grabbing a box of linguine and fresh garlic. "It’s simple but most importantly, it’s foolproof."
We work together, if you count Blair eye fucking me while I move around the kitchen as work. It’s domestic in a way that should feel foreign, but instead feels like the only thing that’s ever made sense.
When I’m done, I set a plate in front of her on the counter and I take the seat beside her.
"Thornton Enterprises had a bad day today," I mention casually, twirling pasta on my fork.
Blair pauses, her glass of sparkling cider halfway to her mouth. "What do you mean?"
"Someone tipped off the SEC and they opened an investigation into insider trading. The stock is down forty percent. So far."
She lowers the glass. "Did you...?"
"What do you think?" She doesn't need to know the details, but I’m not going to lie to her, either. "Karma has a way of catching up to people."
She nods slowly, processing, I think. After a while, she gives me a soft smile. "Feel better?"
“I do.”
We eat in silence for a moment, the only sound the clinking of silverware.
"I've been thinking about names," she says suddenly.
My fork stills.
"For the baby?"
"Yeah. I know it’s early and anything could happen. But... I can't help it." She traces the rim of her glass. "If it’s a boy, I like Rowan."
Rowan.
I let it roll around in my mind. It’s strong. Simple.
"I like it. And if it’s a girl?"
"I haven't gotten that far.”
"You may not need to." I think of Ryder. I think of my own father, a man who left before I could form a memory of him. "The Hollis line hasn't produced a girl in three generations."
"Maybe we'll break the streak."
"Maybe."
Fear takes root inside of me when I think about what’s to come. I failed with Ryder. I gave him too much, taught him too little, and created a monster of entitlement. I don’t want to make the same mistakes again.
"I don't know how to do this," I admit, the words slipping out before I can stop them. "Parenting. I wasn't... I didn’t do a good job with Ryder."
Blair reaches over, covering my hand with hers.
"You're different now," she says. "You’ve gone through it before so you’ll know what to do differently this time. I mean,look at you. You're cooking dinner. You're present. That's all a kid needs, Gabriel. Someone who shows up. Someone who loves them."
