His fight or flight kicked in, and he shot to his feet, ready for his owl to take over. He shifted his weight, preparing to take flight, but he froze. Something was wrong. Very, very wrong. Feathers didn’t prick beneath his skin. Magic didn’t hum through his bones. He stood there, and…nothing happened.
“Esther!” Lilith paced toward the snake and picked it up while Spencer squeezed his eyes shut, focusing on his inner owl and willing it to the surface.
It wasn’t there.
He clutched his chest before raking his fingers through his hair, pulling it at the roots. “What the fuck is happening?”
He felt hollow, like a piece of him had been ripped from his psyche and shredded into a million particles before being cast to the wind. “Lilith?”
She clutched the snake in her hands, and it coiled around her arm, flicking out its forked tongue. “It’s okay, my pet. Spencer was stunned. He didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“Your pet?”
“This is Esther, my familiar that you helped save.”
All this time, she’d been trying to save a fucking snake? He shook his head. He couldn’t think about it now. Right now, the only important thing was his owl. “What happened? Why can’t I shift?”
She put the snake in a terrarium and turned on a heat lamp. “It’s important that your animal be neutralized during the transformation. How do you feel? Oh, you must be parched. It’s been ages since I’ve done this. Come.” She motioned for him to follow and strode down the hallway.
“Neutralized during the…” His stomach sank down to his shoes. Oh, hell no. She wouldn’t. This couldn’t… His hands trembled as he slowly reached toward his mouth and ran his fingers over his teeth.
Fangs.
She’d turned him into a fucking vampire.
His owl was dead.
“What the fuck have you done to me?” He marched down the hall and found her in the kitchen, pouring a thick red liquid into a glass.
She pursed her lips. “You’re hangry. Let’s get some blood in you, and your emotions will settle.” She offered him the glass.
The scent wafted to his senses, making his mouth water and his head spin. Rich and luscious, it had hints of nutmeg and vanilla, like the cookies his grandma used to bake. But it was blood. He crossed his arms. No way in Lucifer’s realm was he drinking that.
She held it toward him for a moment before setting it on the counter and flashing a hesitant smile. “You need to drink?—”
“I don’t want it. I don’t want this.” He flung his hands in the air. “You killed my owl, Lilith.” He snapped her name with enough venom to paralyze a cow, making her flinch. “How could you? I told you I didn’t want this.”
“I didn’t kill your owl; I saved your life. Do you not remember?”
He didn’t know whether to scream or cry. A deep, agonizing ache wrenched in his chest, and the heat of anger burning in his veins made his fists clench. “Do I not remember a zombie vampire ripping my throat out? Yeah, I remember. I also remember telling you multiple times that I did not want to be turned.”
“You would have died otherwise.”
“You should have let me. Death would be better than this.”
Her lips parted, and tears gathered on her lower lids. “Your friends begged me to.”
“And what they want is more important than what I want?”
She lowered her head, gazing at the counter and drumming her fingers. When she looked up at him, a single tear slid down her cheek. “I love you, Spencer. I couldn’t live without you.”
No. He couldn’t bear to hear those words from her. Not now. Not when she’d killed half his soul to keep him alive forever. An eternity without his owl…
A flash of anger burned white-hot in his chest. “You did it on purpose. You set the whole thing up so you’d have an excuse to turn me without my consent.”
She gaped. “What are you talking about?”
“Traveling to Romania, digging up the body. You knew that vampire would still be alive when we unearthed it; that’s why you chose that grave. You planted the snake because you know how much I hate them.” He knew as the words tumbled from his lips that they weren’t true. He didn’t believe what he was saying, but he couldn’t stop the venomous accusations from spilling. “You did it all so you could keep me forever.” He gestured to Percival, who stood on the back of a chair. “So I could be one of your pets.”
