I cut her off by kissing her jaw. “It matters because I want to know how well you’ll listen when I tell you to take my cock,” Isay, voice low. “I want to know if you’ll be better riding me, or under me.”
It’s a challenge I don’t know she’ll accept. Lydia Sterling has a fire in her I want to play with; not tame, not stoke. But I wouldn’t mind being burned by her. Wouldn’t care if she left me to crumble into ash after we were done.
I’ve accepted that she’ll be my total undoing. There’s no way to escape her now.
Lydia visibly shudders, breaths coming faster. “We shouldn’t be doing this,” she whispers.
“I don’t see you getting up,” I reply.
For a moment, her eyes harden, like the challenge has been accepted. She rolls her tongue in her mouth as she considers it; the repercussions, the consequences. Analysing how badly this could screw her up—her work, her life.
“One night,” I promise, rolling my hips into hers. Another sharp intake of breath and her eyelids flutter. “Then you can go back to being my perfect little assistant, and none would be the wiser. It won’t affect your job with me.”
Her eyes find mine again, hesitant and unsure. “You definitely can’t promise me that,” she says, grinding her hips into mine, stealing my breath from me as my cock goes incredibly hard beneath her. “And I don’t get why you’d want to cross the line, Mr Abernathy. Why risk it?”
“Cade,” I growl, flipping us so she’s on her back and I’m hovering above her. “If we get this out of our system now, we won’t be tempted later.”
Her hand moves to cover my heart, eyes wide with surprise. “Or maybe you won’t be able to get enough,” she teases.
“Oh, I know I won’t.” I hover over her, situated snuggly between her thick thighs. “But at least if I fuck you now, I won’t be thinking about doing it later.”
Lydia sucks in another sharp breath. “Are you sure you want to do this…with me?”
“You’re the one giving something up,” I reply easily, even though it’s a lie. If she allows me to go through with this, then I know I’ll be forever trapped in her shadow. There’ll be nothing else for me.
And that’s exactly why you shouldn’t be doing this, I tell myself, gritting my teeth.She deserves fucking better.
It’s that reminder that has me pulling away. Lydia stares up at me in confusion before anger fills her features. “What the hell?”
But I shake my head and scrape a hand through my hair. “I’ve been incredibly inconsiderate about how you would be feeling, and I’ve realised you deserve a hell of a lot better than whatever…thisis.”You deserve better than me, I say silently, unable to look at her.
Lydia throws her legs over the side of the sofa and stands, her hands going to her hips. The red flush darkening her cheeks isn’t the beautiful flush I’ve been trying to tease from her anymore—now it’s angry, and I can tell immediately just how badly I’ve fucked up.
“Seriously?” she says, rolling her eyes. “You kiss me, dry hump me to test whether I’ll fuck you, and then yousuddenlyrealise this isn’t what Ideserve?” She putsdeservein air quotes, before grabbing the hem of her hoodie and tugging it off completely. For a moment, I’m in awe of her; soft, creamy skin. Breasts that are beautiful and large enough to fit into my hands. A stomach that I could one day see full with a baby.
“What is it about me that suddenly has you thinking otherwise?” she demands, suddenly pulling her pants down until she’s standing naked in front of me. “Am I not good enough foryouCade fucking Abernathy?”
She’s stolen my breath with how fucking beautiful she is, but she’s wondering ifshe’sthe problem?
Her question has me chuckling before I can stop myself. “Oh, cowgirl, you have no fucking idea,” I mutter, leaning back, enjoying the view too much. “You aren’t the problem here.”
Lydia makes a frustrated sound. “Then what is? One second you want to know if I’ll be better under you and the next, you’re, what, flaccid?” She says the last part like she’s mocking me, but I recognise the challenge.
“Fine.” I shift, pull my jeans down, and allow my cock to spring free. “Flaccidenough for you?”
Heat flares in her eyes as they dip to my crotch. I watch, heart pounding, as her tongue flicks out to wet her bottom lip. Slowly, Lydia steps towards me and lowers herself to her knees.
This is not the vision that’s been playing in my mind since our kiss. I’m supposed to be the one on my knees.
And yet my sweet little assistant palms my dick and strokes it lightly, gaze flickering to meet mine. “When was the last time you weren’t in control, Mr Abernathy?” she asks, head cocked.
I tense immediately, breathing hard. “The moment you entered my cabin,” I reply honestly.
Shock flickers in her eyes briefly before she tampers it down. “Trust me,” she says, voice hard. “Give me control.”
I have a feeling she means more than just sex. She wants me to give over all control; my life, my work, my peace.
She’s already taken control of my life. She’s stolen my peace. And now she wants me to relinquish control over something I don’t even want.
