Roman. I needed Roman, my mate.
Everything was so hot. So fucking hot. Beads of sweat rolled down my forehead, and I wiped it off with the back of my hand. When I made it up the stairs, I ran to Roman’s room and pushed the door open. Ready to be marked and mated.
Roman’s scent lingered in the air, so strong yet so weak. I walked into the empty room and slammed the door shut. After pushing the short dresser in front of the door and the tall dresser in front of his window, I clenched my fists.
He wasn’t here, and that made everything hurt worse. Since I stepped onto this property, my body had burned hotter. I felt like I was standing in a fire pit with the beads of sweat rolling down my forehead and the unruly boiling of my blood.
Nobody would find me here, at least, and if I shifted into my wolf, I wouldn’t be able to leave. It was perfect enough to make it through the night.
I shuffled through Roman’s closet, sticking my nose into his clothes and smelling his scent. It was so calming, yet it just made me ache more. I wanted him to mark me. Needed him to mark me now. But he was probably out with Vanessa at the damn nightclub, doing things to her that I didn’t even want to think about but couldn’t stop.
My wolf growled and bared her teeth at the thought. Another wave of heat hit me, making me pant for something—anything—cool.
I flung open the bathroom door, started the cold water, and watched it fill up the bathtub. When the bath was half-full, I jumped in, unable to resist it. It was cold—freezing almost—but it didn’t stop that lingering ache.
Why the fuck did this hurt so bad? Why the hell was my life like this? Roman didn’t go through heat. Roman didn’t know how fucking hard this was because he refused to mark me. Roman didn’t know how much pain I was in. He didn’t. He wouldn’t. Ever.
My heart ached, and when the cold water wasn’t doing it for me anymore, I turned the faucet back on, and rested the crook of my neck right on the rushing water, letting it cool me slightly. The bath filled until the water was sloshing over the edge.
I leaned back and groaned loudly. This was too much. Too fucking much.
In a bath full of cold water, I was sweating. No goosebumps, just pure beads of sweat. My wolf clawed her way through me. I needed to get out. Out of here. Now.
Mate. I needed to find a mate. My mate. Any mate.
I jumped out of the water, trying to fight my wolf, but not being able. I landed on all fours and shifted into my wolf, listening to my bones crack but not feeling anything other than this heat. She sprinted to the door, on her hands and feet like the wild fucking animal she was.
She growled at the dressers in front of the door, shook away the sweat, and clawed at the wood. Small pieces jammed into the pads of our paws, but she didn’t care. Over and over and over, our claws dug into it, destroying it and ripping it to pieces.
Stop, I demanded, but my wolf didn’t listen.
Mate. Need mate. Need a mate now.
I could barely breathe. All this fur was making it warmer, hotter, and dryer. She continued to claw and claw, and I wished Roman would just break through the door at any moment.
My head hurt. My vision blurred.
After what seemed like hours with no success, I whimpered. I begged my wolf to stop. I couldn’t handle it. She was suffocating me.
Wave after wave of heat rolled through me. I shifted and laid on the warm ground, tears rolling down my cheeks. I rolled into a ball, then stretched out—unable to find a comfortable position.
I stumbled to my feet and away from the door, so I couldn’t move the dressers myself. Honestly, at this point, I didn’t even think I had enough strength to do that. I eyed the one by the window which had been untouched by my wolf. And a part of me wanted to just hurl myself out of the window, smack against the ground, and pass out.
Everything was more intense than it had been, and much hotter. So much hotter.
Bed.My wolf said.Cool down.
I held onto whatever I could as my legs shook uncontrollably. I couldn’t see anything. I moved around the room, my hands on the walls, searching for the thermostat. When I found it, I turned it down as much as I could. I wanted to freeze.
Then I collapsed onto the edge of the bed, crawled desperately to the pillows, and laid—spread eagle—on Roman’s bed. Cool. I needed to be cool.
I stared up at the ceiling, but I could see nothing but darkness.
Tears fell from my eyes. Everything hurt so bad. I needed my mate. I needed him. Couldn’t he feel the pain I was in? Why wasn’t he coming to get me? Why wasn’t he coming to save me?
Chapter 40
Roman
