Chapter Eighteen
Suds
What the fuck, over? No birthday wishes, no post cards, no nothin’ and now she shows up on my doorstep. What the hell am I supposed to say?Hi Mom, where ya been for the last twenty years?
Sam rises, no doubt wondering who this woman really is.Me too, sugar. I don’t even know how to introduce her.
According to my VA shrink, all folks got this inner child. I never bought into that particular crock of shit until this very moment. Any sane adult would tell this bitch to leave and never come back but a little voice deep within my fucked up brain wants a hug from his mommy.
How screwed up is that?
“Hey,Mom.” My face contorted with disdain, I cross my arms, and wait for an apology.
“I can’t believe you’re here.” She embraces me, lets go, and then narrows her eyes at my gal. “Oh, I didn’t know you had company.”
Sam touches my arm. “I should go.”
“No stay.” With years of painful memories playing out in my mind, I need my wife’s support and her perspective.
“I’m Samantha, Sebastian’s wife.” She holds out her hand and smiles.
“Nice to meet you. Can I sit?” The woman who ruined my youth motions to a kitchen chair while I wrestle with my raging temper. It ain’t just about being pissed off. My head is filled with hurt, disgust, and a whole lot of pain.
“Sure. Can I get you something? Coffee? Water?” Sam opens the refrigerator while I pick the bottle off the floor.
Twisting the cap, I deal with the goddamned elephant in the room. “Why’d you leave?”
Silver Moon gulps and closes eyes so similar to mine, it’s like looking in the mirror. “I didn’t name your father on the birth certificate. You ever wonder why?”
I did but my father’s explanation seemed reasonable enough. “He said you were screwing around and didn’t know, for sure, if I was his.”
She sighs, wringing her hands clasped in her lap. “We weren’t in love. He was eighteen, doing basic training near here when I got pregnant with your older sister. He married me and then redeployed again… and again. I was so lonely, son. And so young.”
“Don’t call me son.” She hasn’t earned the right and I don’t even feel guilty at the way she flinches.
“Fair enough. I deserve that. I did cheat on your father but ours was never a real marriage. We had the paperwork, the legality. Nothing else. Eventually, I met someone, saw a chance at happiness, and took it.”
“And what about Steph and me?”
“I knew your father would provide for you.”
“My God, didn’t you love us at all?” My pathetic plea turns my stomach.
“I had to go. I couldn’t get over it. I thought I could, but I couldn’t.” Tears roll down her face. “Your dad… he was drunk. What he did wasn’t consensual.”
“Stop. I won’t hear this, not about my father. “You’re the cheater and a liar.”
“I knew this wouldn’t be a good idea.” She hands me a number. “Talk to Old Wolf. He’ll back up what I say.”
“Go.” There is no way my holy roller of a sire would’ve raped my mother. She’s playing me. I bet she wants money.
At the door, she turns, eyes watery. “I’m sorry.”
“Yup.”Sorry?She thinks one word can make up for a lifetime of hurt?As her car drives away, I go outside and Sam tries to follow.
“Give me a moment, k?” I don’t want to take my anger out on my wife but she never should’ve invited the woman who ruined my childhood to join us at the table. It was none of Sam’s damn business.
Dreading what he might say, I pull the burner phone out of my back pocket and dial my dad. “Is it true?”
