“Sorry, she’s a bit shy.” On hands and knees, Sam searches under the furniture, allowing me a lovely view of her fine ass.
Ms. Jackson kneels beside her. “Get me one of her snacks. I’ll coax her out.”
“I got this.” Feeling guilty, I jump up and open the cabinet with the dry food.
Catrina, hearing the familiar noise, sneaks out from under the sofa. She feigns disinterest yet sharks around my ankles as I put a few crunchy bits in the stranger’s palm.
“Here, baby. Come say hi.” Trish squats with her palm out.
My kitten sniffs, circles, snatches the kibble, then zooms up the stairs. A second later she dashes back down and hides under the couch, crouching with a tiny growl.
While Sam and I recognize this as perfectly normal, the woman tsk-tsks. “This is bad.”
“Oh, what can we do, doctor?” Mouth open, my smart-mouth partner clasps her hands to her chest.
“Hey, I have a master’s degree in animal behavior and I can assure you, I know what I’m doing.” The shrink wannabe noticed the sarcasm so Sam back pedals.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply… Should Sebastian and I leave you two alone?”
“Oh no. For this to work, I need the whole family involved. First, I’d like to ask you a few questions.” Sitting primly on the edge of the sofa, Ms. Jackson pulls a notepad from her back pocket.
Her gaze goes to me but I’m not saying shit so she turns to the only other human in the room. “Is there any tension between you two?”
“The normal stuff couples go through.” My partner shrugs but the therapist frowns.
“I see… so you’re arguing. Hmm. Are there any external stressors in your pet’s environment?”
“We did have construction going on next door for a while. It was pretty loud.”
“Oh dear.” The woman slides off the cushion, lies flat on her stomach, and gazes under the furniture. “How about any physical violence?”
Hell yeah, there’s about to be some.However, seeing how me and Cat are pals, I don’t say nothing as Ms. Jackson stretches her finger toward her wet nose…
Now, you gotta understand, our baby has only one rule.Y’all don’t come near me when I’m hiding. I figured someone with a fucking degree in animal behavior would know that.
Luckily, the woman has pretty fast reflexes and Catrina’s claws are well-trimmed.
Three, two, one…
The woman screeches and jumps back with her finger bleeding all over the floor. “Well, I’ve seen enough. Your kitten needs sedatives and probably daily sessions. She’s obviously traumatized. I have a vet I work with. I’ll make an appointment.”
After dampening a paper towel, my gal hands it off to the woman. “Ah, I’m so sorry. Catrina gets nervous around strangers.”
I open the door for the woman. “Thank you for comin’. We’ll be in touch.”
My smug tiny tiger, looking not at all contrite, pads up the stairs with her little tail held high. Then, she snatches a plastic toy between her jaws and drops it to the floor below.
In feline speak, I do believe it means, goodbye and good riddance.
Sam picks up the mouse, lets out a whoosh of air, and plops on the couch. Cat dashes down the stairs, jumps on her lap, and nudges her hand for pats. It’s the first time she’s wanted affection for days.
“Huh. I guess the session worked.” She grins. “The woman is pure genius.”
I wink. “Who knew?”
Kneeling beside the sofa, me and my little pal touch noses, hers wet, mine dry. “I didn’t think much of her either, kit-kit.”
Sighing, my pretty woman scratches a fuzzy head until Cat closes her eyes and purrs.
