Luna:Why beat around the cosmic bush, I say. After all, we’re so much more evolved than the men on this ship. They spend way too much time dancing around their feelings rather than just going for it. *heart emoji*
Gemma:You’re a woman of action. I like that. A lot. Tell me more.
—Sent via FLIRTT (Frequency Link for Interstellar Real-Time Transmission)
Two weeks before Christmas…
Luna
Felix told me his sister was gorgeous, but getting to see her larger than life on the ship’s viewscreen a week ago had my hearts racing and my tentacles tied in knots.
Dear Goddess Thekmis, but Gemma is absolutely stunning. I’ve always had a thing for red hair, fur, or feathers on a love interest. And those curls! So damn sexy.
With the limits of our ship’s viewscreen, and her inferior communication technology, I couldn’t get a full look at her, but what I could see I liked a whole lot. She’s got an ample bosom and curves for days. Talk about making me weak in the tentacles!
I grin to myself as I finish up the daily check on our ship’s engine. Now I know what—or rather who—I want for Christmas.
For the last week, I’ve been using Khephren’s invention FLIRTT, aka the Frequency Link for Interstellar Real-Time Transmission, to communicate with Gemma. Thank fuck my friend made it technologically possible to continue talking with her, even from light-years away. Otherwise, I might have lost my damn mind being the only crew member with no romantic prospects in sight, what with Khephren and Sasha already shacked up. Oh, and now I have to deal with Felix and Najar,who dance around one another with the most blatant unresolved sexual tension I have ever had the misfortune of witnessing.
Why can men be so fucking dumb? Doesn’t matter the species, they’re all idiots in my book. Granted, my friends are lovable idiots, but idiots all the same.
I shake my head as I calibrate the engine’s sensor readings. I can’t help but worry about Najar and Felix. Who the fuck knows if those two will suck it up and communicate like adults. They need to acknowledge their interest in one another so they can finally bone and let the rest of us have some peace.
Time’s a-wasting, if you ask me. We’re going to be heading back to Earth in a little over two weeks, and the longer they dither, the less time they’ll actually get to enjoy together.
My droid Rambo beeps at my side and then says, “You’ve got mail.”
I glance behind me to see Khephren squeezing into the small but tidy engine room with me. It’s rare to see him without Sasha glued to his tentacles these days.
I arch an eyebrow at him. “Where’s your lover boy?”
His pink appendages coil happily in the air around him. “Sasha’s working on one of his projects, and I don’t want to disturb him.”
I will admit, Sasha is super cool and now my human bestie. He was an aspiring filmmaker on Earth, but he finally found success when he joined us aboard the Sleigh Belle. We’ve been helping him produce an intergalactic web series calledThe Cat-Tacular Tales of Princess Jonesy. We all play characters, including Sasha’s cat Jonesy, who is naturally the lead.
No matter what Sasha says, Kheph and I are convinced Jonesy is a sign from Thekmis, the goddess revered on our home world Draveth. As a result, all Dravethians hold a deep reverence for species with catlike qualities. Granted, Jonesy ismuch smaller than the half-bipedal half-feline goddess we are familiar with, but she is no less majestic.
Also, when she joined us, we discovered Jonesy was, in fact, pregnant with kittens. So now we have a wonderful little cat colony on our ship, and I couldn’t be happier.
Khephren is thrilled too. Najar isn’t so much, but he’s always a little bit grumpy. I know for a fact he secretly has a fondness for the little furballs, but he feels he has to be the stern voice of reason on the ship. Khephren and I tend to be the more impetuous and adventurous members of our crew.
Setting down my tools, I take a seat on a nearby bench. Knowing Kheph, he wants to talk to me about something. Otherwise, he rarely visits the engine room.
“What’s up, Kheph?”
“We haven’t had time to talk lately. I feel bad about that,” Khephren says, several of his tentacles attempting an apologetic wave.
I snicker. “Bro, I know it’s been a year, but you’ve kind of been shrouded in a love haze ever since you and Sasha hooked up. Not that I blame you.”
He gets a dreamy look in his eyes. “I still can’t believe I found my soulmate in this dark, vast universe. It’s practically a Christmas miracle!”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” I grumble. “Lucky you. You must have been on Santa’s Nice List.”
I may sound a tad bitter, but I am genuinely happy for my friend. Khephren is one of the sweetest beings I know, and Sasha is perfect for him.
Our whole intergalactic adventure among the stars came about because poor Kheph was a runaway groom escaping an arranged marriage his parents had organized for him. Since they were too steeped in Dravethian cultural tradition to listen to him, Khephren decided to take matters into his own tentacles,so to speak. He hightailed it off the planet and into the great universe beyond.
Najar and I joined him without any hesitation. We’ve all been thick as thieves since childhood, and I could entirely relate to Khephren’s quandary. My own family had similar expectations for me, and I knew it was only a matter of time until they’d be dragging me to the Dravethian altar too. Sure, Dravethian women warriors are hot as fuck, not gonna lie, but not being a warrior myself, I would have been expected to be a stay-at-home partner.
