“You don’t know that.” My voice is almost a grunt.
“Dying with her won’t fix anything. We need to figure out a way to go there and pull her back.”
“Can’t you transcend there?”
“I’m not sure. I’ve never seen anything like this. Can you focus on your bond? Try to find her? Feel where she is, even if it’s faint. Then send me the thought.”
I close my eyes. There’s only emptiness. So much emptiness, making me empty inside.
23
MARLAK
Iclose my eyes and try to call Astra, try to feel where she is. There’s nothing. I could be wrong that she’s in this darkness outside this room, but it’s the only thing that makes sense.
My chest feels cold as I try to imagine her in this nothingness, this void.
With a deep breath, I try to calm down, try to quiet that anxiety corroding me, see if in the silence between my inner anguished screams I can find something. I extend my arm and send the thought to Azur.
Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.
And pure darkness.
I’m so angry at myself. Why did I let her escape with Nelsin?
I ended up running away not much later, and was able to push away the few giants in my path while Ferer found enough circles to get us back.
Astra could have escaped with us—should have. But now I can’t go back, can’t fix everything that’s wrong. Letting darknesstake me sounds comforting considering the alternative is to live with so much regret.
I pull my hand from Azur’s touch, realizing he could be seeing that. At least he doesn’t say anything, leaving me with my silence and anguish.
Still, the idea of trying to come up with a solution feels ridiculous, when I don’t know what to do. What part of my mind can conjure anything?
“Focus on your bond.” Azur breaks the silence.
To his credit, his expression is grave, and I believe he does care for Astra, in his own way, even if his voice grates on my nerves.
I don’t even know if I can still try to reach through our bond, when it’s painful like a hot iron. Worse than that. It’s more painful than fire.
Closing my eyes, I try to think, try to search through the depths of my mind for all I know about magic, about the Witch King, and yet it’s so little. I hadn’t even heard about this heart, this castle.
No. This castle has been in my dreams. Different, yes, but it was this place. I try to think about those dreams, those strange happy moments when we were united while under the spell of slumber.
Then something else tugs at me. It’s not a bond, but a connection, filling me with sadness, but determination too.
Cherry Cake is flying through a starry sky above a forest. I wonder if he’s saying goodbye to me. He can’t come to the Shadow Lands, bound like he is to the Witch King. He can’t.
But he wants to—and I don’t think I can stop him.
A crash startles me, and a gust of air prevents glass shards from reaching me. Cherry Cake comes through, and I realize Azur blocked the glass.
I approach the beloved unicorn and pat his neck, so glad to see him. Part of me dreads what may happen to him by coming here, but I’m also thankful to see my old friend and companion. He’s shimmery and brilliant, with a sphere of light around him. Strangely, the circle reminds me of Astra’s magic.
The image he sends me is of me and Azur on his back, finding Astra. I wonder if Azur needs to come, and Cherry Cake lets out an annoyed neigh.
“Fine, my friend,” I whisper, then turn to Azur. “He’s saying he can take us to her. If we climb on him. It’s a double saddle. You don’t have to come.”
Cherry Cake neighs again, and I add, “He thinks you should come for some reason.”
